#fridge

There's a strange new trend in my office... People have started naming food in the office fridge Today I ate a turkey sandwich called Kevin.

A man goes to the doctor... Man: 'Doctor, I always have to pee at night. Every night! Isn't that weird?' The doctors answers: 'Well, it's quite common actually. That's all?' M: 'Hmm no, I don't think so. Oh wait! Every time I open the door to the bathroom, the light automatically goes on! Isn't that strange?' The doctor looks doubtful to the man and responds: 'Well I can't do anything about that, I'm sorry.' The man goes home and the doctor overthinks the conversation. Still confused about why t…

2 friends die on the same day. They meet up in heaven One asks another, ""How did you die?"" ""I was home after work and I saw some mans shoes infront of the door that were not mine. I thought my wife was cheating on me. I went in and checked the wardrobe, no one there. Checked under the bed, no one there. I was so happy that I got a heart attack"" ""Well if you checked the fridge both you and I would be alive""

What the difference between a fridge and a virgina? Fridge don't fart when you take the meat out

STUDENT: Sir, can I ask a question? Read this on facebook. Hilarious haha STUDENT: Sir, can I ask a question? TEACHER: Yes! STUDENT: How do you put an elephant inside a fridge? TEACHER: I don't know. STUDENT: It's easy, you just open the fridge and put it in. I have another question! TEACHER: Ok, ask. STUDENT: How to put a donkey inside the fridge? TEACHER: It's easy, you just open the fridge and put it in. STUDENT: No sir, You just open the fridge take out the elephant and put it in. TEACHER: O…

I'm Hungary I'm Russian to the kitchen to czech the fridge There is turkey But it's covered in Greece There's Norway I can eat that. Edit:spelling

A man's best friend is sentenced to death by hanging The day James Wright is set to be executed his best friend waddled home and told his wife ""I don't want to hear about it, Wright was my best bud but I just want to go take a bath and have one night without the news or any senseless nagging"" His wife understads and says she'll put his dinner in the fridge As the man is drawing his bath his wife hears on the news that there has been a stay of execution issued and James will live a while longer…

Is your fridge running? Why didn't you send it to Rio? All the best to our contestants!

When I was a kid, I asked my dad where babies come from. He said, ""The fridge! You should go see if there's one in there now! If there isn't, bring me a beer!""

Which do you want me to bring in first? Yesterday my parents are preparing dinner and my mom wanted me to get the chicken. When she opens the fridge and notices the egg carton is empty, she ask me to get the eggs as well. So then I asked her... ""Which one do you want me to bring in first, the chicken or the egg?""

Timmy and mum are quite punny. Timmy : I'm Hungary,. Mum : Why don't you Czech the fridge. Timmy : Ok, I'm Russian to the kitchen. Mum : Hmm...maybe you'll find some Turkey. Timmy : Yeah, but its all covered in Greece. Yuck ! Mum : There is Norway you can eat that. Timmy : I know, I guess I'll just have a can of Chile. Mum : Denmark your name on the can. Timmy : Kenya do it for me? Mum : Ok , I'm Ghana do it. Timmy : Thanks, i'm so tired Iran for an hour today. Mum : It Tokyo long enough. Timmy …

Heaven is getting too full... So God tells St. Peter to only let in people with really sad deaths, so the first man walks up and says ""I live on the 30th floor of an apartment building and I suspected that my wife is cheating on me so I get off of work early and go home. When I get there I discover clothes on the floor and my wife is just sitting there, so I start searching the apartment because I know he's in there. Finally I go out on the balcony and I see someone hanging there by their hands…

Mom why do they call me... [So my friend told me this joke today] A little girl walks into her mother's room and asks 'mom, why did you name me daisy?' 'Because when you were born a daisy petal fell on your head,' she replied. The next child walks in and says 'mom, why did you name me rose?' 'Because when you were younger a rose petal fell on your head,' she replied. The last kid walks in and says 'bluhblehbluuu.' The mother says 'Shut up fridge!'

My daughter came up to me and asked, ""Daddy, why am I called Rose""?... My daughter came up to me and asked, ""Daddy, why am I called Rose?"" ""Well darling, when you were little, a rose petal fell on your head"", I responded. A minute later, my second daughter came up to me and asked, ""Daddy, why am I called Blossom?"" ""Well darling, when you were little, a blossom petal fell on your head"", I responded. Later, my third daughter came up to me and shouted ""DAAADDDD!!!"". I responded, ""SHUT …

Whats the difference between fridge and a 14 year old boy? The Fridge dosen't cry when you put the meat in

A woman cries to her husband ""honey, the fridge isn't running"" Husband replies ""Good. I'm not in the mood for fast food""

If we are not if we are not meant to have midnight snacks why is there a light in the fridge ?

Student and teacher STUDENT: Sir, can I ask a question? TEACHER: Yes! STUDENT: How do you put an elephant inside a fridge? TEACHER: I don't know. STUDENT: It's easy, you just open the fridge and put it in. I have another question! TEACHER: Ok, ask. STUDENT: How to put a donkey inside the fridge? TEACHER: It's easy, you just open the fridge and put it in. STUDENT: No sir, You just open the fridge take out the elephant and put it in. TEACHER: Ooh...ok!! STUDENT: Let me ask another one. If all the …

Fridge My fridge has been acting weird, I guess it's bi-polar.

Is your fridge running? Nah, it's chillin.

STUDENT: Sir, can I ask a question? TEACHER: Yes! STUDENT: How do you put an elephant inside a fridge? TEACHER: I don't know. STUDENT: It's easy, you just open the fridge and put it in. I have another question! TEACHER: Ok, ask. STUDENT: How to put a donkey inside the fridge? TEACHER: It's easy, you just open the fridge and put it in. STUDENT: No sir, You just open the fridge take out the elephant and put it in. TEACHER: Ooh...ok!! STUDENT: Let me ask another one. If all the animals went to the …

Putting juice in the fridge is fine but put it in the oven and you're literally Hitler

What did Bob Marley say to his wife after he opened the fridge? ""No, Woman, no pie.""

Student: Sir, can i ask a question? **STUDENT**: Sir, can I ask a question? **TEACHER**: Yes! **STUDENT**: How do you put an elephant inside a fridge? **TEACHER**: I don't know. **STUDENT**: It's easy, you just open the fridge and put it in. I have another question! **TEACHER**: Ok, ask. **STUDENT**: How to put a donkey inside the fridge? **TEACHER**: It's easy, you just open the fridge and put it in. **STUDENT**: No sir, You just open the fridge take out the elephant and put it in. **TEACHER**:…

Why are wedding gowns white? Cuz the dishwasher should match the stove and the fridge