Which do you want me to bring in first? Yesterday my parents are preparing dinner and my mom wanted me to get the chicken. When she opens the fridge and notices the egg carton is empty, she ask me to get the eggs as well. So then I asked her... ""Which one do you want me to bring in first, the chicken or the egg?""
She has a coy pond. All the pretty fish swim away when you try to feed them.
Hi, I'm a high paid business consultant. I see you've named your business "Dale's Paint Supplies" but what if it was named "Best Dog Memes"
Wife: [holding old dog] I thought you took care of this yesterday Stormtrooper husband: *looks out back to see gun marks all over the yard*
Me: Define Illegal Cop: You're drunk, riding a horse, shooting a gun and yelling 'For Narnia' Me: I want my lawyer.
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