#fridge

Some questions... How do you throw a brick out of an airplane? [Open the door and throw it](/spoiler) How do you put a giraffe in a fridge? [Open the fridge and put the giraffe in it](/spoiler) How do you put an elephant in a fridge? [Open the door, remove the giraffe and put the elephant](/spoiler) There was a meeting in the forest where all the animals gathered except which one? [The elephant, its still in the fridge](/spoiler) A swamp is filled with crocodiles but still a lady crossed it easi…

Heaven getting too full. (worth the read) Three men were standing in line to get into heaven one day. Apparently it had been a pretty busy day, though, so Peter had to tell the first one, ""Heaven's getting pretty close to full today, and I've been asked to admit only people who have had particularly horrible deaths. So what's your story?"" So the first man replies: ""Well, for a while I've suspected my wife has been cheating on me, so today I came home early to try to catch her red-handed. As I…

An old man at the doctors office... His daughter took him to a doctor for a check up. During the check up - the doctor asks the old man about his visits to the toilet at night, and he replies: ""I wake up, walk to the bathroom and God turns on the light for me"". Confused, the doctor finishes his procedure and tells the old mans daughter about the whole ""God-light"" thing. To which she replies: ""Oh no! He's been using the fridge again!""

I found some dressing in my fridge that expires on 12-21-2012.... It's called Mayanaisse....

some simple jokes whats big white and falls out of a tree? a fridge whats green and has wheels? grass i was lying about the wheels

simple joke (but dirty) what's the difference between a gay guy and a refrigerator? a fridge doesn't fart when you pull your meat out

Why did the little girl drop her ice cream? She got hit by a bus. Sequel: Why did the little girl's sister drop her ice cream? Someone threw a fridge at her.

When heaven was full... God ordered the angel at the gate to only let people in who have died horrible deaths into heaven. So the angel asked the first man who came up, ""How did you die?"" The first man replied, ""You see, I was coming home from work early this day because I suspected my wife of cheating on me, and I wanted to catch her in the act. So I came home to our apartment, on the 3rd floor mind you, and on my way up, I heard a lot of scuffling. When I got in my wife argued that no one e…

I'm very pleased with my new fridge magnet. So far I've got twelve fridges.

I spent a couple of hours defrosting the fridge last night, or ""foreplay"" as she likes to call it...

I just poured myself some iced tea. I could have sworn I heard one of the beers in my fridge whisper ""What the F*ck!?""

Why is there an eject button on the DVD remote? I still have to get up and take the disc out. It's like having a remote to open the fridge

Hate it when you open the fridge and can't find what you were looking for; like happiness and perfect abs.

I am constantly putting things where they don't belong, like the cereal in the fridge or my keys in the laundry or my faith in other people.

My girlfriend left a note on the fridge, ""It's not working. I cant take it anymore, I'm going to moms"" I opened the fridge, the light came on, the beer was cold, WTF is she talking about?

I just found a jar in the fridge, with expiry date 21/12/2012. I looked at it twice, and indeed, it was mayannaise!

LSD makes users lose weight' That makes sense, it's kinda hard to get to the fridge when there's a dragon guarding it.

I had to defrost the fridge last night before bed. Or foreplay, as she calls it.

I love long romantic walks to the fridge. That's how I maintain my curves

The Girlfriend left a note on the fridge ""IT'S NOT WORKING, I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE , I'M GOING TO MOTHERS "" I opened the fridge, the light came on, The Beer was Cold,,, What the Hell is she talking about !?!?

What is green, sings and can be found in the fridge? Elvis Parsley

That awesome moment when you open the fridge and the first thing you see is the thing you wanted to eat.

Heading out for drinks, bail money's on top of the fridge.

The speed of light is when you take out a bottle of beer out of the fridge before the light comes on.

Fridges should have glass doors.That way i dont have to stand with the fridge door open trying to figure out my next move.