#second-boy

One day bush went jogging... One day Bush was out jogging and accidentally fell from a bridge into a very cold river. Three boys, playing along the river, saw the accident. Without a second thought, they jumped in the water and dragged the wet president out of the river. After cleaning up he said, ""Boys, you saved the President of the United States today. You deserve a reward. You name it, I'll give it to you."" The first boy said, ""Please, I'd like a ticket to Disneyland!"" ""I'll personally …

Savoir Faire Three French boys are discussing what it means to have ""savoir faire"". The first boy says ""It is like this. If a man comes home from work and finds his wife in bed with another man and leaves quietly so as to not disturb them, then he has savoir faire."" The second boy say ""No. That is Laissez faire. If he tips his hat and says 'Excuse me. Please continue.' then he has savoir faire."" The third boy says ""No. If a man comes home from work, finds his wife in bed with another man,…

The Walnut Joke - Two boys were walking home one day when they came upon this huge walnut tree. WALNUT JOKE - Two boys were walking home one day when they came upon this huge Walnut tree. One boy said, ""Lets gather all the walnuts and then we'll divide them between us."" So they gathered all the walnuts. They stuffed them down their shirts, down their pants, down their sox and even tied burlap bags to their ankles to put the walnuts in. Then they started walking home... When they came close to …

Two boys are having a competition. They have made a bet to see who could fart the hardest. To settle the bet, they have a pan filled with flour and leveled. Whoever can displace the most flour wins. The first boy crouches over the pan and lets one rip. When the flour settles, they see the pan has only half the flour as it did to begin with. ""I can do better than that."" Said the second boy. They refill the pan and level the top. The second boy crouches over the pan and lets a mighty one go. Onl…

So a middle school is putting on a musical The musical is about classical composers and they need three boys to play the leads. The first boy comes in and says he wants the part of Beethoven. His name is marked down and he leaves. The second boy comes in and says he wants the part of Mozart. His name is marked down and he leaves. However, the last boy rushes in too early and they aren't ready for him. ""You have to go out and wait for your name to be called."" They say to him. ""Fine,"" he says.…

There once was a farmer... There once was a farmer who was very overprotective of his three daughters. Turned out that all of his daughters had dates that same night. So he went on to the porch with his shotgun and waited for the dates to come. The first boy came and said, ""*Hi, I'm Freddy. I'm here for Betty to go out for spaghetti. Is she ready?*"" The farmer thought he was decent and let him go with his daughter. The second boy came and said, ""*Hello, I'm Joe. I'm here for Flo to go see a s…

Three boys are walking down the railroad tracks and find a $10 bill..... .... and they're trying to decide what to do with the money. The first boy says ""let's buy some candy"" and the other boys say ""that's what we always do... Let's use it for something different."" The second boy says ""let's buy some comic books"" and the other boys say ""that's what we always do when we don't spend it on candy."" The third boy says ""let's buy a box of tampons"". The other boys look at him and say ""what?…

Little Johnny And Vibrator A Teacher Asks The Class To Name Things That End With Tor And That Eat Things The First Little Boy Says: ""Alligator."" Teacher: ""Very Good, That's A Big Word."" The Second Boy Says: ""Predator."" Teacher: ""Yes, That's Another Big Word. Well Done."" Little Johnny Says: ""Vibrator, Miss."" After Nearly Falling Off Her Chair, She Says: ""That Is A Big Word, But It Doesn't Eat Anything."" Johnny: ""Well My Sister Has One And She Says It Eats Fuking Batteries Like There'…

On Top Of Cherry Hill Three kids were late for their first junior high class. The first student, a boy, enters the classroom Teacher: Why are you late? Boy: I'm sorry! I was on top of cherry hill. The second boy enters about ten minutes later. Teacher: Why are you late? Boy 2: Sorry! I was on top of cherry hill. A third kid enters the classroom, a girl.... Teacher: Let me guess. You were on cherry hill too? Girl: No? But my name is Cherry Hill.

Three boys are in the schoolyard bragging about their fathers. The first boy says, ""My Dad scribbles a few words on a piece of paper, he calls it a poem, they give him $50."" The second boy says, ""That's nothing. My Dad scribbles a few words on a piece of paper, he calls it a song, they give him $100."" The third boy says, ""I got you both beat. My Dad scribbles a few words on a piece of paper, he calls it a sermon. And, it takes eight people to collect all the money!""

Three boys decide to sneak fruit on a farmer's property... Three boys, hungry, hot, and tired after a summer day of play decide to sneak onto a farmer's property to eat some fruit without him knowing. After they climb through the fence, the three boys split up to go eat their favorite fruits. From his house, the farmer sees the boys and becomes infuriated, seeing as they have done this countless times in the past. He rushes out of his house and finds the first boy eating cherries. Enraged, the f…

Argument between 3 boys First boy says, ""my dad is so cool, he drives the car so fast that the road rips apart!"". Second boy says, ""what's so cool about that? My dad flies the aeroplane so fast that the sky rips apart!"". Third boy says, ""pffft. My dad farts so hard his pants rip apart!""

Three young boys are talking about the creepiest people they know. The first boy says, ""I heard old man Jones once caught a bat, cooked it, and ate it!"" The second boy, unimpressed, replied ""Well I heard that there is a clown down on Maple Street that has red eyes and spiders for pets!"" The third boy finally pipes up. ""I heard my dad the other night talking to my mom. I guess she bleeds for a whole week every month and doesn't even die!""

Three boys are sitting across from an exotic car dealership... Admiring the cars, when a genie pops out of the sewer and offers them each a wish. The first boy says, ""I want a Porsche!"" The genie nods and a brand new Porsche appears in the road. The kid gets in and drives off. The second boy says, ""I want a Rolls Royce!"" Again, the genie nods and a shiny new Rolls appears. The kid jumps in the car and drives away. The last kid thinks about it for a minute. He finally looks up and says, ""I w…

Hair Two 10-year-old boys are walking down the road and they see a Cadillac driving past. One of the boys says, ""Wow. I wish I had that Cadillac."" The other says, ""Nah, I wish I had hair all over my body!"" First boy asks him why he would want that. And the second boy says, ""Well, my sister's friend has this little patch of hair here (*he points to his crotch*) and she gets all the Cadillacs she wants!""

Redneck definitions: asparagus There were two farmers, farmer Bill and farmer John. Farmer John had two sons and he named them both ""Gus"", because he really couldn't think of a better name for the second boy. Farmer bill called up farmer John and said, ""could you gimme a hand with bailing all this hay down here at my farm?"" Farmer John replied, ""well shoot, Bill I wish I could, but I got to tend to my chickens before sun down... But I'll tell you what, 'ah-spare-a-gus!!'

Two ten year old boys sitting on the steps to a brothel... ... watching men enter and exit all day. At one point, two men come out smiling, laughing and talking loudly to each other. ""Not bad for fifty bucks!"" Says the first man with a large smile. ""Not bad."" Agrees the second with a grin and a wink. The first boy has an idea and immediately turns to the second. ""How much money have you got?"" He asks. ""Thirty cents."" Says the second. ""Give it here,"" he checks his own pockets and states…

Two boys sitting to pee Two five year old boys are sitting at the potty to pee. When one says, "" Your thing doesn't have any skin on it!"" "" I've been circumcised."" Says the second boy. "" What does that mean?"" ""It means they cut the protective skin skin off the end."" "" How old were you when it was cut off?"" "" My mom said that I was two days old."" "" Did it hurt?"" "" You bet it hurt, I couldn't walk for a whole year!""

A mother had three sons... The first day the oldest boy ran up to her and asked: ""Mom, why am I named Feather?"" The mother replied: ""Well, son, thats because when you were a baby a tiny feather landed on your head."" The next day the second boy ran up to her and asked: ""Mom, why am I named Leaf?"" The mother replied: ""Well, son, thats because when you were a baby a tiny leaf landed on your head."" The third day the youngest boy ran up to his mother and said: ""Moaaah, whaaa yu chueehhe blua…

Three boys were walking along the beach one day when they see a cave. The first boy goes in and is looking at a banknote on a big rock when a ghostly voice calls out '' I am the ghost of Auntie Abel and this five dollars stays on the table!'' The second boy goes in and is reaching for the money when the same thing happens again. The third boy goes in sees the five dollars and cries out''I am the ghost of David Crockett and this five dollars goes in my pocket!''

First boy: My dad saw a horrible witch and didn't turn a hair! Second boy: I'm not surprised - your dad's bald!

First boy: She had a beautiful pair of eyes her skin had the glow of a peach her cheeks were like apples and her lips like cherries - that's my girl. Second boy: Sounds like a fruit salad to me.

One day there were these three boys walking down the street all of a sudden they heard a yell: 'HELP! HELP!' When the boys got to the noise they saw Bill Clinton in a lake drowning. The three boys saved him from drowning. Bill Clinton asks the first boy how he could ever repay him. The boy said 'I want a boat.' The second boy said 'I want a truck.' And the third boy said 'I want three tombstones with are names all on them.' Bill Clinton said 'why is that son?' The little boy said 'because when m…

First boy: Are you having a party for your birthday? Second boy: No I'm having a witch do. First boy: What's a witch do? Second boy: She flies around on a broomstick casting spells.

First Boy: Why is your brother always flying off the handle ? Second Boy: Because he's got a screw loose !