Lie Clocks A man died and went to heaven. As he stood in front of St. Peter at the Pearly Gates, he saw a huge wall of clocks behind him. He asked, 'What are all those clocks?' St. Peter answered, 'Those are Lie-Clocks. Everyone on Earth has a Lie-Clock. Every time you lie the hands on your clock will move.' 'Oh,' said the man, 'whose clock is that?' 'That's Mother Teresa's. The hands have never moved, indicating that she never told a lie.' 'Incredible,' said the man. 'And whose clock is that on

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Since this is Obama's last year... He decides to throw a small private party and invites the candidates running for president this year. He invites Hillary Clinton, Jeff Bush and of course the smart and talented Donald Trump on his private jet party. They are the only people on the jet plane and are flying over the tropical islands. After about couple of hours of cruising, the pilot cries frantically, ""We seem to have a problem, the plane is going to crash due to some malfunction. We have only

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A man died and went to heaven... ...As he stood in front of Saint Peter at the Pearly Gates, he saw a huge wall of clocks behind him. He asked, ""What are all these clocks doing here?"". St. Peter answered, ""This is the wall of Lie-Clocks. Everyone on Earth possesses a lie clock, and every time you lie, the hand on the clock moves."" ""Oh"" said the man, ""Whose clock is that?"" ""That's Mother Theresa's. The hands have never moved, indicating that she never told a lie"". ""Incredible"" said th

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Clocks A man does and goes to heaven, as he aproaches the pearly gates he sees St. Peter and a wall behind him. ""St Peter, mind my questioning, but why are there clocks?"" St Peter smiled and motioned for the man to follow him. As they got to the end of the wall they saw two labeled ""Mother Teresa"" and ""Abraham Lincoln"". ""These display how many times each of these people have lied. As you can see, it is still midnight on Mother Theresa's clock. She has never lied. Its also 12:02 on Abraham

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ObamaCare explained by a Chicago Plumber to Obama himself Chicago Plumber Only weeks after leaving office on January 20, 2017, former President Barack Obama discovers a leak under his sink, so he calls Troy the Plumber to come out and fix it. Troy drives to President Obama's new house, which is located in a very exclusive, gated community near Chicago, where all the residents have a net income of way more than $250,000 per year. Troy arrives and takes his tools into the house. He is led to the g

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A man dies and goes to heaven.. As he stood in front of st. Peter at the pearly gates he noticed a huge wall of clocks behind him. He asks ""what are those clocks for?"" St.peter replied ""those are lie clocks everyone on earth has one, every time you tell a lie the minute hand moves."" ""Oh"" said the man ""who's clock is that?"" ""That's mother Teresas, the hands have never moved."" ""Incredible"" said the man, ""And that's Abraham Lincolns, his has only moved twice."" ""Where's Obama's?"" Ask

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Obama tells the truth A man dies and is at the pearly gates waiting to get into heaven. He notices all these clocks hanging at the entrance and asks what they are doing there. The man at the gate says: ""those are lie clocks. For each lie the clock takes one minute off of your life and it also has a counter for days for the bad liars. See that one the one with a zero for the days and its still at midnight? That is mother Theresa's she has never lied and there is George Washington's only 3 lies""

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The corrupt politician When the prime minister of India came to meet Obama, he took him to his private residence. On gazing upon the opulence and luxury of Obama's home, the prime minister exclaimed ""Your salary isn't enough to afford this! How do you do it?"" Obama takes him to a window and says ""Do you see that bridge out there?"" The PM says ""Yes."" Obama pats his pocket and says ""10% mine"" Later on, Obama visits the Prime Minister in India and he is taken to his private residence. There

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A Washington, DC flea goes to book a vacation with his travel agent because he's been cooped up in a K Street lobbyist's crotch for the past 8 months and he feels overworked. So his travel agent says, ""You won't believe the package I've got for you! Fifteen days in Obama's haircan you believe it? He's going to be at Camp David the whole time, it should be real nice and relaxing."" The flea says yes and heads out to Camp David. But two days later he comes back to his travel agent and says, ""Wel

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Obama's California Wildfire meeting A mathematician, a physicist, and Barack Obama are discussing the best ways to prevent forest fires in California when a fire breaks out in their room. They're locked inside and must find a solution. The mathematician quickly calculates the amount of water needed to extinguish the fire in the most efficient manner. The physicist quickly notices a fire extinguisher in the room. Barack Obama insisted to cut out the oxygen in the room because he learned that in H

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