#mother-teresas

A man died and went to heaven As he stood in front of St. Peter at the Pearly Gates, he saw a huge wall of clocks behind him. He asked, ""What are all those clocks?"" St. Peter answered, ""Those are Lie-Clocks. Everyone on Earth has a Lie-Clock. Every time you lie the hands on your clock will move."" ""Oh,"" said the man, ""whose clock is that?"" ""That's Mother Teresa's. The hands have never moved, indicating that she never told a lie."" ""Incredible,"" said the man. ""That's Abraham Lincoln's …

I have the heart of a saint And a lifetime ban from Mother Teresa's grave.

A man died and went to heaven As he stood in front of St. Peter at the Pearly Gates, he saw a huge wall of clocks behind him. He asked, ""What are all those clocks?"" St. Peter answered, ""Those are Lie-Clocks. Everyone on Earth has a Lie-Clock. Every time you lie the hands on your clock will move."" ""Oh,"" said the man, ""whose clock is that?"" ""That's Mother Teresa's. The hands have never moved, indicating that she never told a lie."" ""Incredible,"" said the man. ""That's Abraham Lincoln's …

So a man dies, goes to Heaven, and sees St. Peter. There are many clocks surrounding him so the man asks, ""What are these clocks for?"" St. Peter replies, ""These are lie clocks, they tick once for every lie you tell. Here we have Mother Teresa's clock. She has never lied so the clock has not moved. Honest Abe has only lied twice in his life, so it has only ticked twice."" The man then asks, ""So where is George Bush's clock?"" St. Peter replies, ""Oh, that is in Jesus' office, he is using it a…

On day in heaven A person died and went to heaven. As she stood in front of Saint Peter at the Pearly Gates, she saw a huge wall of clocks behind him. She asked, ""What are all those clocks?"" Saint Peter answered, ""Those are Lie-Clocks. Everyone on Earth has a Lie-Clock. Every time you lie, the hands on your clock will move. ""Oh,"" said the woman, ""whose clock is that?"" ""That's Mother Teresa's. The hands have never moved indicating that she never told a lie."" ""Whose clock is that?"" ""Th…

A Man Dies A man dies and goes to heaven, and as he passes the gates a wall of clocks emerge. St. Peter appears, ""Welcome to heaven!"" he exclaims, the man still confused by the clocks asks, ""What are all these clocks doing in heaven?"" St. Peter explains, ""These are lie clocks. Everyone on earth has a lie clock. Every time a person lies, the clock hands move one notch."" The man intrigued, points and asks, ""Whose clock is that?"" St. Peter replies, ""That is Mother Teresa's clock, it has no…

Lie Clocks A man died and went to heaven. As he stood in front of St. Peter at the Pearly Gates, he saw a huge wall of clocks behind him. He asked, 'What are all those clocks?' St. Peter answered, 'Those are Lie-Clocks. Everyone on Earth has a Lie-Clock. Every time you lie the hands on your clock will move.' 'Oh,' said the man, 'whose clock is that?' 'That's Mother Teresa's. The hands have never moved, indicating that she never told a lie.' 'Incredible,' said the man. 'And whose clock is that on…

A man went to heaven... So a man in the hospital died of a sickness and went up to heaven. Before he could enter he had to go to a sort of office building, he noticed the office walls were covered in clocks. He asked the angel working at the desk, ""What are these clocks for?"" To which the angel replied, ""These clocks move 1 minute for every lie someone tells or told."" The man points to a clock, ""Whose is this?"" The angel tells him, ""This is Abraham Lincoln's clock, it has only moved 2 min…

A man died and went to heaven. As he stood in front of St. Peter at the Pearly Gates, he saw a huge wall of clocks behind him. He asked, ""What are all those clocks?"" St. Peter answered, ""Those are Lie- Clocks. Everyone on Earth has a Lie- Clock. Every time you lie the hands on your clock will move."" ""Oh,"" said the man, ""whose clock is that?"" ""That's Mother Teresa's. The hands have never moved, indicating that she never told a lie."" ""Incredible,"" said the man. ""That's Abraham Lincoln…

Mittens keeping it cool. A man dies, goes to heaven, stands before St. Peter, and see a huge wall of clocks. The man asks what all the clocks are for and St. Peter explains, ""These are lie clocks. Everyone on earth has a lie clock. Every time a person lies, the clock hands move."" Pointing to one, the man says, ""Whose clock is that?"" ""That's Mother Teresa's,"" St. Peter answers. ""The hands have never moved, indicating she never told a lie."" ""Incredible,"" the man responds. ""And whose clo…

A man died and went to heaven.. As he stood in front of St. Peter at the Pearly Gates, he saw a huge wall of clocks behind him. He asked, "What are all those clocks?" St. Peter answered, "Those are Lie-Clocks. Everyone on Earth has a Lie-Clock. Every time you lie the hands on your clock will move." "Oh," said the man, "whose clock is that?" "That's Mother Teresa's. The hands have never moved, indicating that she never told a lie." "Incredible," said the man. "That's Abraham Lincoln's cl…

A guy arrives at the gates of heaven. St. Peter welcomes him and gives him a tour of the main building. One of the room is filled with clocks. St. Peter explains: "These clocks keep track of every lie someone deceased or still alive has ever made. For example, this is Mother Teresa's clock. The time is exactly midnight 0 minutes 3 seconds, which means she has lied three times in her life. Bill Cosby's clock just went forward a second, which means he just lied." After some looking around, the gu…

A man died and went to heaven... A man died and went to heaven. As he stood in front of St. Peter at the pearly gates he saw a huge wall of clocks behind him. He asked, "What are all those clocks?" St. Peter answered, "Those are Lie-Clocks, everyone on earth has a lie clock. Every time you lie the hands on your clock will move." "Oh," said the man, "Whose clock is that?" "That's Mother Teresa's. The hands have never moved, indicating that she never told a lie." "Incredible," said the man. …

A man died and went to heaven As he stood in front of St. Peter at the Pearly Gates, he saw a huge wall of clocks behind him. He asked, "What are all those clocks?" St. Peter answered, "Those are Lie-Clocks. Everyone on Earth has a Lie-Clock. Every time you lie the hands on your clock will move." "Oh," said the man, "whose clock is that?" "That's Mother Teresa's. The hands have never moved, indicating that she never told a lie." "Incredible," said the man. "That's Abraham L…

Donald Trump dies and goes to heaven... He soon reaches the pearly gates, and is greeted by St. Peter himself. Donald notices a wall of clocks behind St. Peter, some of them ticking, and some are not, and asks, "What's with all the clocks?" St. Peter replies, "These are Lie-Clocks, every person on Earth and in Heaven has one, and they tick once every time you tell a lie. Over here we have Sylvia Brown's, which is moving once every 2 seconds. On the other hand, Mother Teresa's Lie-Clock has not…

A man died and went to Heaven. As he stood in front of the Pearly Gates, he saw a huge wall of clocks behind him. He asked, "What are all those clocks for?" St. Peter answered, "Those are Lie-Clocks. Everyone who has ever been on earth has a Lie-Clock. Every time you lie, the hands on your clock move." "Oh", said the man. "Whose clock is that?" "That's Mother Teresa's", replied St. Peter. "The hands have never moved, indicating that she never told a lie." "Incredible", said the man. "And whose …

A guy dies and goes to heaven. He looks around and sees clocks. He asks St. Peter, "What are all these clocks for?" He replies "OH, those are lie clocks, everytime you lie the hands move." "Whose is that?" "Mother Teresa's. Its never moved." "How about that one?" "Oh, thats Abe Lincoln's. Its moved a bit." The man thinks awhile and asks,"What about \[insert politician here\]'s clock?" "Oh that ones in Jesus' office. He's using it as a ceiling fan."