#first-lady

Reports are indicating that Ivanka Trump may take on some roles of the First Lady. Still no word on who will handle the duties of President.

If I were Hillary, I'd ask Michelle Obama to stay on as first lady.

I promise to find a new girlfriend right away when my old girlfriend gets eaten by walkers. America needs a first lady.

"As first lady you would be responsible for the White House china. Any thoughts?" MELANIA TRUMP: Oh, Donald says he's getting rid of China

Three ladies meet up for a drink once a week. The first lady says: ""The other night, when my boyfriend got in from work, I surprised him. I was standing in the hallway, wearing these tall leather boots, a corset, long black silk gloves, and lots of makeup. I looked him in the eye and said 'Hello there, big boy.' He grabbed me, flung me to the floor and we made love right there and then and it was AMAZING."" Next week they meet up again. The second lady says to the first one: ""I took a tip from…

Two Old Ladies There were once two old Jewish ladies on a vacation in Israel. They are floating together out in the dead sea when one says to the other, ""want a smoke?"" She replies, ""Here? How?"" The first lady reaches in to her bathing suit and pulls out a balloon with two cigarettes and a lighter in it. The second one asks, ""What's that?"" ""Oh? You don't know? It's a condom!"" They smoke, relax, and enjoy themselves. After they've been floating for a while, the second old lady says, ""And…

2 old ladies are having a smoke outside when it starts to rain. One lady says to the other, ""Do you wanna know how to keep your cigarette dry when it rains?"" The second lady responds, ""Sure"". So the first lady proceeds to tell her to buy a pack of condoms and each time she's having a smoke out in the rain, get out one of the condoms, place it over the cigarette and it will stay dry. Well the second old lady thinks it's a great idea so she strolls down to her local pharmacy to buy a pack of c…

Four ladies were bragging to one another about how successful their sons were. First Lady: My son is a priest. When he walks into a room, everyone calls him ""Father"" Second Lady: My son is a bishop. When he walks into a room, people call him ""Your Grace"" Third Lady: My son is a cardinal. When he walks into a room, he's called ""Your Eminence"" The fourth lady said, ""My son is 6 feet 3, has board square shoulders, is gorgeously handsome and dresses so smartly. Whenever he walks into a room, …

Two old ladies were seated next to each other on a train. The first lady turns to the other and asks, ""where you headed to?"" The second lady replied with disgust, "" I'm heading to a place where they know not to end a sentence in a preposition."" The first lady sits quietly for a minute then turns back to the second and says, ""so, where you headed to, bitch.""

In other news.... We now have the most attractive First Lady since Marilyn Monroe.

If hillary wins, trump supporters can at least take solice in 1 fact. Bill clinton is going to be the first lady.

Why doesn't Melania Trump want to be the first lady? Because she would have to move into a smaller house.

A Mormon president would face the most difficult issue any president has. Deciding who's the First Lady, who's the Second Lady, and who's the Third Lady.

It's not funny when a First Lady runs for President. It's Hillary-ous.

If Clinton wins presidency, who will be First Lady? Monica Lewinsky

What is Bill Clinton's favorite Disney movie ? ....First Lady and the Tramp. What is Lindsey Graham's favorite Disney movie ? Chip & Dale What is The Donald's favorite Disney movie ? First Lady and the Trump.

Two old ladies are outside of their retirement home smoking. All of a sudden it starts to rain. The first lady pulls out a condom, snips off the tip, and puts it over here cigarette. The second lady asks why she did this. The first responds, ""it keeps my cigarette from getting too wet."" The next day, the second lady goes to her local 7-11 and asks the cashier for a box of condoms. The cashier is surprised due to her age, but asks ""what size do you need?"" The lady responds, ""doesn't matter, …

Kanye West becomes the President And Kim Kardashian becomes the First Lady

Kim Kardashian as First Lady

Airplanes and Black people The president the first lady and Oprah are all riding in a plane. They were discussing who could make the most people happy. Michelle Obama said ""I can toss down a dollar and make a person happy."" Oprah scoffed and said, ""I can throw down ten dollars and make ten people happy."" Barack Obama laughs and says ""I can throw down 100 dollars and make 100 people happy."" The pilot turns around and says, ""I can throw 3 black people out the window and make everybody happy…

Husbands, dreams, and dragons Three ladies are sitting around, discussing their husbands. The first lady says, ""I once dreamt that I married a dragon. The very next day, I met Glen. I knew he was the one when I saw that he had three dragons tattooed on his arm."" The second responds, ""That's funny! I had a dream just like that and the next day, I met George. He turned out to have two dragons on his chest!"" The third pipes up, ""My dream was a little different and I decided to marry Ken when I…

Two Ladies are sitting on a bench... Two ladies are sitting on a bench together smoking cigarettes, and a storm starts to come in. It starts to sprinkle and the second lady puts a condom on her cigarette. Lady 1 : ""Why did you put a condom on your cigarette?"" Lady 2 :""Well this way my cigarette won't go out."" The next day the first lady goes to the drug store.She seeks out an employee and asks "" Do you have any condoms large enough to fit a camel?""

Three Old Ladies and a Robber Three old ladies were sitting on a park bench, and a man jumped out of the bushes and flashed them. The first lady had a stroke, the second lady had a stroke, and the third lady's arm was too short to reach.

Michelle Obama was not the first person to think of the ""Turnip for what"" She was the First Lady

Barack Obama walks into a Halloween Party with the First Lady on his shoulders... ...the doorman says, ""Excuse me Mr. President, but this is a Halloween party. Why aren't you dressed up?"" Obama says, ""I am dressed up! I'm a snail. I got Michelle on my back.""