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My mate John knows everyone in the world Just cross-posting this from over on /r/AskReddit My mate John claims to know everyone in the world. Last week, we were in the pub, and he was bragging about it. ""Not everyone, though, John!"" I said. He said ""Wait a minute"", pulled out his phone, and made a call. Next thing you know, we're in a taxi on the way to Buckingham Palace. We pull up outside, the guard waves us through, saying ""Hi John!"", and we stop at the front door. Prince Phillip answer

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Another airplane joke Not sure if this is already here or not: Obama, Michelle Obama, and Oprah are on a plane. Obama says, 'I'm the President, I'm so rich, and have so much money, I can throw 1 million dollars out and make 1 million people happy.' Michelle Obama said, 'Well since I'm your wife, I can throw 2 million out of this plane and make 2 million people happy.' Oprah said, 'I have my own talk show and give stuff everyday, so I can throw 4 million dollars out of this plane and make 4 milli

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Airplanes and Black people The president the first lady and Oprah are all riding in a plane. They were discussing who could make the most people happy. Michelle Obama said ""I can toss down a dollar and make a person happy."" Oprah scoffed and said, ""I can throw down ten dollars and make ten people happy."" Barack Obama laughs and says ""I can throw down 100 dollars and make 100 people happy."" The pilot turns around and says, ""I can throw 3 black people out the window and make everybody happy

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Best Obama joke Ive heard in a while so Obama, Michelle Obama, and Oprah are in airforce one, Obama turns around and says ""I could throw a $10,000 bill out the window and make someone very happy"". Michelle Obama turns and says ""I could throw 10 $10,000 bills out the window and make 10 people really happy"". Oprah said ""Ill beat both of you, I can throw 100 $10,000 bills out the window and make 100 people really happy"". Then the pilot turns to them and says ""Yeah but i could crash this plan

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When Trump visited the White House before his presidency... He asked then president Obama how he managed to run two successful terms. "Simple", Obama replied, "Just get an intelligent wife" "How do I know my wife is intelligent?" Trump asked. "Just ask her intelligent questions and if she answers correctly, then you know she is intelligent". Obama then called Michelle and asked "Darling, your parents have a child, the child is neither your sister nor your brother, who is the child?" "The c

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