#president-obama

President Obama just signed a law banning mobile phones in prisons. Well there goes about half of my followers

Fox News reports that President Obama rapped his oath in Arabic while cutting the head off a goat.

CNN: President Obama Saves The Life Of A Choking Child. FOX: Failed President Obama Tries To Take Jobs Away From Hard Working EMS Workers.

I think it's weird how President Obama appointed George Clooney Secretary Of Handsome. #DNC

PRESIDENT OBAMA: I pardon this turkey- TURKEY: Nope. I'm ready. 2016 was a shit show. Kill me now

BREAKING: President Obama shows solidarity with victims in war-torn countries by posting another selfie with celebrities.

President Obama has done nothing for the people of Ohio. For example they still live there

Crime rates are down 100% after President Obama made it illegal to do crimes. "I don't know why we didn't think of this before," he said.

I know exactly how President Obama feels. Every time my kids are forced to listen to me, they make angry Republican faces.

The Moral of this is...... President Bush tried, and failed. President Clinton tried, and failed. President Obama tried, and succeded. The moral of this is... If you want someone dead, hire a black man...

President Obama and the old man One sunny day in January, 2017, an old man approaches the White House from across Pennsylvania Avenue where he'd been sitting on a park bench. He speaks to the U.S. Marine standing guard and says, ""I would like to go in and meet with President Obama."" ... The Marine looks at the man and says, ""Sir, Mr. Obama is no longer president and no longer resides here."" The old man says, ""Okay,"" and walks away. The following day the same man approaches the White House…

Obama's no longer President January 21,2017 an old man walks up to White House gate and tells security guard: ""I want to see President Obama."" Very patiently the guard says: ""He's not President anymore."" The old man quietly walks away. January 22 same old man walks up to the gate and says: ""I want to see President Obama."" Same guard says: ""He's not President anymore."" The old man quietly walks away. January 23 same old man walks up to the gate and says: ""I want to see President Obama.""…

Obama's announcement Today, President Obama announced that, after January 20th, the official title of ""U.S. Government"" will be changed to include quotation marks around Government.

President Obama is doubling down on fighting global warming He's already sent three battalions of Marines to invade the Sun.

If Trump wins the election and replaces President Obama... ...orange will be the new black.

I'm going as president Obama for Halloween this year. I'll tell you you're getting different candy, but it will be the same candy from last year.

Star Trek Pakistani President Mr. Zardari just finished giving a speech at the UN, and walks out into the lobby where he met President Obama. They shook hands and walked together in the long corridor when suddenly the Pakistani said, ""You know, I have just one question about what I have seen in America."" President Obama says ""Well your Excellency, anything I can do to help you, I will do."" The Pakistani whispers, ""My son watches this show 'Star Trek' and in it there are Russians, and Blacks…

John knows everyone John at work brags about him knowing everyone. His boss, Mike, is quite mad at him, and one day he says ""It's impossible that you know everyone on Earth"", but John replies ""That's not true, I'll prove it to you, just says a name"". Mike, quite confident, replies ""President Obama"". ""Ah, Barack, an old friend. Let's take a flight, we are going there to meet him"". Once they arrived at the 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue, John enters the White House, greetings all the security gu…

If Obama said If President Obama said he was in favor of oxygen, republicans would suffocate themselves.

President Obama is in a race with the previous 4 presidents... George W. Bush, William Clinton, George H. W. Bush, and Ronald Reagon. They are running a mile to see who can get the fastest time. Barrack Obama placed last, with a time of 15:12 George H.W. Bush placed 4th with a time of 13:57 Ronald Reagon placed 3rd with a time of 11:33 William Clinton placed 2nd with a time of 9:57 And Bush did 9:11

President Obama states he stands with Hillary. ""So do I."" Bill states sadly under his breath.

What's the difference between President Obama and a bucket of shit? The shit's in a bucket ! *that redneck spit noise followed by a ting*

Barack Obama Bar Jokes During a World Economic Summit, Barack Obama, Mexican President Enrique Pena Nieto, Russian President Vladimir Putin, and French President Francois Hollande are ceremonially riding in Japan's newest bullet train. As you might know all of these political leaders have big egos and this is what ensued. Barack Obama says ""This is a fine bottle of wine Francois"" Upon hearing this President Francois Hollande throws out a case of France's finest wine and says ""In France fine w…

Trump gets elected president.. On inauguration day, he swears in as President. Before delivering his inauguration speech, he turns to Obama and says ""President Obama, You're Fired""

Did you know President Obama can run around the White House in 11:00? It would be a record, but Bush did 9:11.