#india

Tim The Train Expert Long read but worth! There was this man named Tim and Tim comes from a long line of train conductors. His father was a train conductor and so was his father before him. But as Tim grew up he realized that was not his passion but the pressure from his family to follow in his fathers footsteps was too great, so after Tim graduated high school he enrolled in training in hopes to be hired at a train station. After a few years of going through this training school and failing man…

INDIAN BRAIN vs JAPANESE BRAIN - By Dr Somdutt Prasad In Japan, in a soap manufacturing company the soap blocks were made, then wrapped in a wrapping paper automatically on an assembly conveyer belt and finally packed in cartons... Many a times it happened that the wrapping machine wrapped the paper without soap. i.e. you had an empty packet without soap. To rectify this problem the Japanese company bought a X-ray scanner from the US for $60,000 to check on the assembly line whether the containe…

Casper vs kali Casper is a sarcastic kid and during his trip to india he made fun of some priests there . Those priests got offended and told the boy that goddess kali with 100 heads will teach him a lesson. As the priets said kali appered b4 the boy that night with 100 heads having a fierce look...but casper bust out into laughter...when kali asked what's so funny then Casper replied if i catch cold my hands are not enough to take care of 1 running nose...i just got a mental picture of you havi…

Comeback to a teacher Teacher: Name all the prime ministers of India Student: I don't know. Teacher: When I was of your age I used to know everything. Student: When you were young there were only one or two prime ministers.

An Italian order Pizza in India An Italian businessman goes to India on a business trip, but he hates Indian food because its too spicy for him. So he asks the concierge at his hotel if there's any place around where he can get Italian food. The concierge tells him he's in luck; there's a pizza place that just opened, and they deliver. The concierge gives the businessman the phone number, and he goes back to his room and orders a pizza. Thirty minutes later, the delivery guy shows up to the door…

what is a female journalist returning from India famous for ? Banged up abroad!

The Ambassador from India attends a Native American cultural show.... After a show, the Ambassador approaches the Chief and says: ""You know, Columbus made a mistake! We're the real Indians!"" The Chief looks at him and replies: ""I know. We've been paying for it ever since.""

Geography of a woman Between the ages of 15-18, a woman is like China. Developing at a sizzling rate with a lot of potential but as yet still not free or open. Between the ages of 18-21, a woman is like Africa or Australia. She is half discovered, half wild and naturally beautiful. Between the ages of 21-30, a woman is like America or Japan. Completely discovered, very well developed and open to trade especially with countries with cash or cars. Between the ages of 30-35, she is like India or Sp…

How many Americans does it take to screw a lightbulb? None. Their President outsources the job to India.

Obama is visiting India! Indian government has installed 15000 CCTV cameras. Come on! Just cause he is Black, he won't steal!

Over 15k CCTV cameras installed for Obama's visit to India!! This is ridiculous. Just because he's black doesn't mean he'll steal anything. Damned racist's!!

India installs 15000 surveillance cameras for Obama's visit to New Delhi C'mon man! that's racist! After all, he is the President of United States! Moreover, it's not like India is left anything worth stealing since British looted all their wealth anyways.

Hyper intelligent student Teacher: whoever answers my next question, can go home. Teacher: India is on which continent? Boy: potato! He leaves for home then.

What do people call their grandmother in India? Naana

Copyright In India copyright means the right to copy.

What do you call an alligator from India whose in charge of telling everyone what to do? A Deli-gator...I'll be here all week!

How can you tell if the code is broken? (SW Engineering joke) If India worked on it

I failed my Cultural Studies exam. The question was ""Describe the role that India plays in the modern world"". Apparently ""Tech Support"" is not the correct answer.

Martin Luther King, Jr.'s speech praising non-violence in India surprised everyone when they pelted him with several thousand flatbreads.

The corrupt politician When the prime minister of India came to meet Obama, he took him to his private residence. On gazing upon the opulence and luxury of Obama's home, the prime minister exclaimed ""Your salary isn't enough to afford this! How do you do it?"" Obama takes him to a window and says ""Do you see that bridge out there?"" The PM says ""Yes."" Obama pats his pocket and says ""10% mine"" Later on, Obama visits the Prime Minister in India and he is taken to his private residence. There…

Topical Jokes for 9/5/14 (for best results, imagine these being read by your favorite late night host) In Oregon, a veterinarian discovered 43 socks in a Great Dane's stomach. The dog was taken to the vet when the owner wanted to find out why his sock drawer was growling. To ward off evil spirits, a woman in India has married a stray dog. The woman's biggest complaint about being married to a dog is everything. A new study has determined that wearing a bra, does not cause breast cancer. The stu…

Some of the interesting lines that can be seen written behind trucks in India. 1. Overtake me if you have the balls, or else tolerate being stuck behind my ass. 2. You, the one with ill thoughts, may your children live, and drink cheap country liquor when they get old. 3. The rich feed on biscuits and cake, while the drivers feed on clutch and brake. 4. Those who were in a hurry are gone. [Not a joke though] 5. What are you looking at? This is how it (this truck) would move! 6. Don't hang you wi…

So They Cancelled Halloween In India This Year. They ran out of Ghandi.

An Indian, an Italian and a Jewish man go for an interview to be an undercover detective Three men applied for the job of a undercover detective: Johhny English from India, Marc Grayberg, a Jew; and Tom Silanti, an Italian. The chief decided to ask each applicant just one question and base his decision upon the answer. When Grayberg arrived for his interview, the chief asked him, 'Who killed Jesus Christ?' He answered without hesitation, 'The Romans killed him.' The chief thanked him and he left…

Interview Once a Sardar attended an Interview. Interviewer Give me the opposite words. Sardar Ok Interviewer Made in India Sardar Destroyed in Pakistan Interviewer Good Keep it Up Sardar Bad Put it Down Interviewer Maximum Sardar Mini Dad Interviewer Enough! Take your Seat Sardar Insufficient! Don't take my seat Interviewer Idiot! Take your seat Sardar Clever! Don't take my seat Interviewer I say you get out! Sardar You didn't say I come in Interviewer I reject you! Sardar You ap…