#steve-jobs

If Steve Jobs can do that to the iPhone, think what he could do to Verne Troyer.

Now that Steve Jobs is gone we'll never ever know why c**t autocorrects to Cynthia. WHO WAS CYNTHIA?!?

Steve Jobs' entire legacy is invalidated by the shortness of the iPhone charger's cord.

Ten years ago, we had Steve Jobs, Johnny Cash & Bob Hope. Now we have no jobs, no cash, & no rope to hang myself with if I read this again.

Wow, 5 years ago we had Steve Jobs and Neil Armstrong. Now we have no jobs and no arms.

Women shouldn't work outside the home. It's STEVE Jobs, not EVE Jobs.

You've gotta be careful talking to Steve Jobs because he'll say the word 'eyeballs' and really be referring to his custom-made Apple gonads.

If I was Steve Jobs I would engrave on my tombstone: iDied.

If Apple has taught me anything, it's wait to see the "Steve Jobs" movie until they release a second version.

"'There is no 'I' in team!" *Steve Jobs yells at his iTeam*

"Hey Steve Jobs, I'm really happy for you, And I'ma let you finish, but Moses had the greatest tablet of all time!" -Kanye

Gone are the days when I could just jump in the pool fully clothed without thinking twice. Thanks a lot, Steve Jobs.

Apple CEO Tim Cook has come out as gay. This totally explains why the new iPhone charger holes became tighter after Steve Jobs died.

1964:"Remember kids," a youth basketball coach says, "there's no "i" in team." "Not yet," whispers 5th grade Steve Jobs, "... not yet."

Old Twitter is what you'd get if an engineer brought New Twitter to Steve Jobs, and Steve beat on him relentlessly to simplify it.

I've just found my iPhone autocorrects "cunt" to "Cynthia." Which means somewhere in Steve Jobs' past is a woman with one HELL of a story.

Bill Gates is so rich... he hired cancer to kill Steve Jobs.

Steve Jobs will be back He's an Android afterall.

Ten years ago we had Johnny Cash, Bob Hope and Steve Jobs. Now we have no Cash, no Hope and no Jobs. Please don't let Kevin Bacon die.

After his death, Steve Jobs wakes up in Hell and asks Satan, ""Why am I here?""... (It's not in bad taste.) After his death, Steve Jobs wakes up in Hell and asks Satan, ""Why am I here? Certainly I've changed the world for the better through an innovative technological revolution."" ""That's quite true,"" says Satan. ""You belong 'upstairs' and I'm only borrowing you for a few days. But see, whenever new evil-doers land in hell, they're presented with a brand new 17 inch MacBook Pro with quad-co…

so apparently there isnt an app for pancreatic cancer. Ironic that something abbreviated PC killed Steve Jobs, does anyone think his funeral will be a flash affair?

Steve Jobs dies and goes to Purgatory (Heard this way before he died) Eventually St. Peter comes to him and lets him know that he's done a lot of good things for the world and caused a lot of trouble, so they're not sure where to put him. He lets him get a tour of heaven and hell and let him decide where he wants to be. So Steve goes on a tour of heaven and it's nice. Not great, but nice. Clouds, cherubs, harps and all that. Then he goes down to hell and everything is beautiful Warm beaches, bea…

Got any Steve Jobs pun/jokes? I'll start 1. They took err Jobs! 2. His death was App-alling 3. Windows may get viruses, but at least they don't get cancer 4. I tried to apply for a job at Apple. The clerk told me there were no Jobs there. 5. These are rumours. He will be back in 6 months time slimmer, faster and in a 128gb model. 6. Two tumors are talking one of them says ""we should get Jobs"" 7. A lot of hipsters are gonna get back into Apple because Steve Jobs is gonna be way underground. 8. …

Steve Jobs isn't really dead The nurses are just holding him the wrong way [Source](http://sickipedia.org/joke/view/1108293)

They say an apple a day keeps the doctor away... Steve Jobs proved this one wrong.