#america

Why do Chinese tourists get disappointed when they visit America? Because when they buy souvenirs they find out they were made in China.

Why Trump and that lady you sit next to on the plane who asks way too many questions are the same. They are both loud, annoying, fat, barely male, and completely unable to make america great again.

Research shows that the number one cause of divorce in America is Marriage

A liar, a cheat, and a bigot walked into a bar... ""Let's make America great again!"" he said.

Why can't America ever win a chess tournament? Because they're missing two towers

Mike was an experienced big game hunter... He went into the woods one day in northern Canada, and saw a family of brown bears. Being the merciless, ruthless hunter that he was (Mike was not Canadian), he shot and killed the whole family. The black bears convened after this. Angry about the last of the brown bears in Canada being killed, they plotted revenge on Mike. They ventured down to America in search of Mike, alas they could not find him. A year or so later, Mike traveled back to northern C…

Walking around Washington, Joe Biden sees Donald Trump and says to him... Hey Donald! (says Joe Biden), I know I'm an ugly, bumbling, retard, with ridiculous hair plugs, so I've long since accepted that women don't find me attractive. But for your whole life, the most beautiful women have always loved you. I've wanted to know what it was like to be a man who actually gets the women. Trump says, well... you spend every day in the White House with Barack. I mean, sure he's an idiot, hates America,…

What's Donald Trump's favorite TV show? Well considering how he thinks America lacks law and order and his affinity to grabbing women by the pussies, his favorite show is Law and Order Special Victims Unit.

I hear Donald Trump is going to ban cans of parmesan cheese... ..he's going to make America grate again.

Trump wants to pass a law banning grocery stores from selling shredded cheese... ... in order to ""make America Grate again""

What's the difference between America and yogurt? One has culture.

Donald Trump, Hillary Clinton, Tim Kaine, Mike Pence and an elderly lady were on a plane that was halfway across the Atlantic Ocean on their way to America. Suddenly, the plane began to start shaking violently. A voice on the intercom said, ""We lost an engine! Going Down! Passengers take a parachute and get away before it blows!"" Unfortunately there were only 4 parachutes available. Hillary grabbed one, said, ""I'm sorry, but as a potential first female president and keeper of Wall Street inte…

A Pakistani boy takes admission in an American School. A Pakistani boy takes admission in an American school ... Teacher : Whats your name ? Boy : Nadir Teacher : No, you are in America now so from now on your name is Johnny. The boy went home after his school ended and his mother asks him ""How was the day Nadir?"" Boy : Mom, I am an American now, so call me Johnny. The boy's Mom and Dad both get offended and beat him up. Next day he goes back to school all bruised ... Teacher : What happened J…

Hillary Is Like Francium... Take her *elect*ron away and she won't blow up have of America.

A Rabbi, an Imam, and a good old boy redneck American Soldier are all in a plane crash and find themselves standing before St. Peter at the pearly gates. Saint Peter says to them ""You've each made mistakes in your lives that could delay your entry into heaven, but I'm willing to let all three of you in at once if you can find something good in your brother standing beside you."" The Imam looks at the Rabbi and says ""Surely this fellow man of God served his people and his temple well, no matter…

With the Holiday Season right around the corner The Transvestites of America Union would like to remind you to eat, drink, and be Mary.

A mexican magician tells the audience he will disappear on the count of 3. He says, ""Uno, dos... but before he is able to finish, a SWAT team kicks down the door and deports him over the border for the crime of being a Mexican in Trump-run America and for lack of originality due to him using the exact same joke for the umpteenth time.

Alahu Akbar A man, who was on his way to work, was at a stop light when a car full of Muslims pulled up next to him. They started shouting at him saying ""Alahu Akbar"" and ""Death to America"". The man is a bit freaked out. When the light turned green the man waited so as to put some distance between himself and the Muslims. The Muslims accelerated quickly into the intersection and were promptly killed by a semi truck that ran the light. The man got to work and had a chance to think about what …

Hillary Clinton is a liar, cheater, thief, narcissist, who will say anything, do anything for money and power. She tells bold face lies making promises she never intend to keep. She does a half ass job to show people she is ""keeping her promise"" but will bail on the project before it finished. She starts wars with no intention of finishing the job, leave the troops with no support and abandon them while they are overseas. She takes bribes from foreign enemies and will screw America every chanc…

Donald Trump Campaign Slogans ""We Shall OverComb"" ""No Amigos"" ""Comb Over To The Dark Side"" ""Don't Be A Chump, Vote For Trump"" ""Stump For Trump"" ""Democrats, You're Fired!"" ""This country needs the D"" ""Everybody Needs to Comb Down"" ""Make America White Again"" ""Keep Calm and Vote for Trump"" ""Trump on the Bandwagon"" ""Trump Speaks for U.S."" ""Build That Wall"" ""Make America Safe Again""

Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump are on a sinking boat, who survives ? America

Why are so many Italians named Tony? Because on the boat over to America their shirts said To N.Y.

Donald and Hillary walk into a presidential debate. And America walks out

Racial issues in America are very complex They're not just black and white

America was declared the country with most busty people. In the both genders category.