#osama

HEY OSAMA I FOUND YOUR 72 VIRGINS THEY ARE ALL ON MY TIMELINE TALKING ABOUT STAR WARS

Joke that was totally told to me by a Navy SEAL and I am not lying or anything After numerous rounds of, ""We don't know if Osama is still alive,"" Osama himself decided to send George W. Bush a letter in his own handwriting to let him know he was still in the game. Bush opened the letter which appeared to contain a single line of coded message, 370HSSV-0773H. Bush was baffled, so he e-mailed it to John Kerry. Kerry and his aides had no clue either, so they sent it to the FBI. Noone could solve …

Why did osama kill his wife? When he lifted her skirt, he saw *bush* .

Who will win between Obama and Osama in chess? Osama, Obama is missing two towers.

Osama is back Osama is somehow alive and decides to laugh a bit at the rest of the world. So he writes and sends a note to president Obama. On the other side of the world Obama gets called out of his conference. His assistant says in a quiet voice: ""Mr. president, sir, we have bad news... We have received a message from Osama Binladen! He is still alive!"" - ""What does it say?"" - ""370H55V 0773H"" Obama is clueless. So he sends this message to his secret service... They are clueless as well..…

Osama bin Laden dies and goes to heaven . . . . . . . . So he's waiting at this gate when all of a sudden, George Washington comes out. ""You attacked the country I helped found!"" and beats the crap out of him. Then he goes back inside and Thomas Jefferson comes out. ""You hate the Declaration of Independence that I wrote!"" And beats the ever-loving shit out of him. Then he goes back inside. The James Madison comes out. ""You son-of a bitch . . .""and starts beating Osama some more. ""Oh Merci…

French Joke Q. Why do we need France on our side against Saddam and Osama? A. So the French can show them how to surrender.

Osama Bin Laden's afterlife... After he was killed by Seal Team Six, Osama Bin Laden immediately found himself in a large room filled with fat middle aged men wearing strange costumes. As he looked around he saw a gigantic sign that said ""Welcome fellow Trekies."" Confused by his surroundings, Osama wanted to get out of the room, only to face Muhhammed himself, blocking the door. ""This is not the paradise I was promised in the Quoran."" ""Yes it is...where did you expect I'd find you 72 virgin…

Osama was found hiding in mansion in Abbottabad. Talk abbot-a-bad place to try and hide...

Lets role play I'll be Osama, You be a cave, and I'll hide up inside you

Bush and Osama decided to settle the war once and for all. They sat down and decided to settle the whole dispute with one dog fight. They would have 5 years to breed the best fighting dog in the world and whichever side's dog won would be entitled to dominate the world. Osama found the biggest, meanest Doberman and Rottweiler female dogs in the world and bred them with the meanest Siberian wolves. They selected only the biggest and strongest puppy from the litter, and removed his siblings, which…

The Late Osama After dying a grisly death in a fire fight, Osama made his way to the pearly gates. There, he was greeted by George Washington. ""How dare you attack the nation I helped conceive!"" yelled Washington, slapping Osama in the face. Patrick Henry came up from behind, ""You wanted to end the American's liberty, so they gave you death!"" Henry punched Osama in the nose. James Madison came next and said, ""This is why I allowed the government to provide for the common defense!"" He took …

George W. Bush and Osama bin Laden are having a conversation via Al Jazeera television. Bin Laden tells George Bush ""There is no point of engaging in further war. I can see total peace in the future!"" George Bush replies ""Oh yeah and tell me what you see?"" Osama answers ""I can see New York with new great buildings on one side and beautiful new buildings on the other side and everything is peaceful and wonderful."" George Bush says ""Wow is that what you see? Well I'll tell ya what I see …

On a scale of 1 to Osama... How good was the hiding spot?

The Aussie Farmer, Osama Bin Laden And A Biker Three men - a Farmer, Osama bin Laden and a Biker are all walking together one day. They come across a lantern and a Genie pops out of it. 'I will give each of you one wish, which is three wishes in total', says the Genie. The Farmer says, 'I am a farmer and my son will also farm. I want my land to be forever fertile' POOF! With the blink of the Genie's eye, the land was forever fertile for farming. Osama was amazed, so he said, 'I want a wall…

If I had a gun with 2 bullets and Hitler, Osama and Putin in a room, I'd probably shoot Putin twice. The other two are dead anyway.

Osama goes to hell He arrives and the devil greets him. ""Welcome"" the devil says. ""You have been a very bad man and you deserve to be here"". ""I will give you three options and you will decide which one you will do for eternity!"

What's the difference between Obama and Osama? O(b-s)ma

Osama, Ghaddafi, and Kim Jong Il? Santa must be taking his naughty list a tad seriously this year.

what is obamas last name? OSAMA ! xDD LOL

Batman hit Penguin over the head with a vase and said: "T-Pau!" Penguin said: "Don't you mean 'Kerpow!'?" Batman said: "No, I had china in my hand!" What do you call a Teletubby that's been burgled? A Tubby. The only reality show I want to see is 'Find Osama'. Twelve minor celebrities are sent to Afghanistan to track down Bin Laden. We'll either find Osama or lose some minor celebrities. Either way, we're up! Andy Parsons

Osama consults a psychic about the date of his death. Psychic: You will die on an American holiday. Osama: Which one? Psychic: Anyday you die shall be an American holiday.