#sara

*stood on Eiffel tower watching a beautiful sunset* Sara? *Gets down on one knee* *audible gasp* "Yes?" Help my knee is made of magnets

is this Sara? hi, this is Tom from HS. my god its been years! Anyway, im calling because u changed your HBO Go password & I need the new one

1.Why did Sara fall off the swing?? 2.Knock Knock 1.She didn't have any arms!! 2. Who's there? NOT SARA!!

another sarah and moishe Sarah has to get some minor surgery or other but it's going to require shaving. Down there. Sara says no one but my husband moishe is shaving me there. Doctor gets Moishe, explains the situation, gives him a can of shaving cream and a disposable razor. Moishe takes the can, carefully applies the shaving cream, then picks up the disposable razor. He looks at his objective for a minute, at the razor, back to his objective, perplexed. He says, 'Hey, Sarah. Go like this! [ma…

One day an at home wife is alone and the doorbell rings... She opens it to a guy, ""Hi, is Tony home?"" The wife replies, ""No, he went to the store, but you can wait here if you want."" So they sit down and after a while of silence the friend says ""You know Sara, you have the greatest breasts I have ever seen. I'd give you a hundred buck just to see one."" Sara thinks about it for a second and figures, what the hell - a hundred bucks! She opens her robe and shows one to him for a few seconds. …

Having mutual friends with someone does not mean you should add them on Facebook. It's like a stranger knocking on your door and saying, ""Hey we both know Mike, John, and Sara. You mind if I come in?

A guy goes over to his friends house, rings the bell. The wife answers the door. ""Hi, is Tony home?"" ""No, he went to the store."" ""Well, you mind if I wait?"" ""No come in."" They sit down and the friend says, ""You know Sara, you have the greatest breasts I have ever seen. I'd give you a hundred bucks if I could just see one."" Sara thinks about this for a second and figures what the hell - a hundred bucks. She opens her robe and shows one. He promptly thanks her and throws a 100 bucks on t…

Every Friday, Ms. Jane ends class a little early... and plays a game with the kids. She will read off famous quotes, and if one of the students in her 5th grade class can correctly name who said it, they get to leave school a little early. Today the quotes would come from US Presidents. She saw Tommy, who always won this game, sitting in the back, at attention, ready to go home early. She made note to try and let some other people win today. The first quote she read was "Speak softly and carr…

Two ladies are in the gym locker room .... changing into their running outfits. One lady notices her friend's tummy and asks: "Sara, why is there wax in your belly button?" Sara says, "Oh, you'll never believe how romantic my boyfriend can be. He just loves to eat by candlelight."

The most famous person of all times Who is the most famous person of all times. That was a subject of a contest among Catholic School's 5th graders with $100 prize. The teacher asked Jon first. He said it was Bill Clinton. The next one was Kevin who said it was Gorge Washington. After collecting responses from almost all participants the teacher with not much hope asked the last girl, Sarah, who happen to be Jewish. Sara raised and said. I think it was Jesus. The teacher was jubilant and pronou…

The Naughty Friend One day an at home wife is alone and the doorbell rings. She opens it to a guy, "Hi, is Tony home?" The wife replies, "No, he went to the store, but you can wait here if you want." So they sit down and after a while of silence the friend says "You know Sara, you have the greatest breasts I have ever seen. I‘d give you a hundred buck just to see one." Sara thinks about it for a second and figures, what the hell - a hundred bucks! She opens her robe and shows one to him for a f…

Karma hits you in the face Three women dies for some unknown reason, they dont know each other. We can call them Sara, Jenna and Robyn. Before they can enter heaven, they needed to answer a simple question asked by God. Sara was the first in line, God asked her: How many times have you cheated? Sara looked at God and answers: I've cheated 4 times. God Answers: Here in heaven you get to drive a Volvo from year 92. Sara jumps in the car and drove away. Next up was Jenna. God asked her: Ho…

Dave got called to the directors office... "Dave we have to make some cutbacks, either Jack or Sarah has to be laid off" "This is really hard" Dave says "Sarah is my best worker but Jack has 3 kids to support" The director gives him a day to think about it. Later that day he calls Sara to his office "Sarah I've got a real problem. I've got the either lay you or Jack off" Sarah thinks for a moment "you should probably jack off. I'm on my period"

500 dollars Dave, Carl and Carl's wife, sara were playing cards on Thursday morning. Dave's card fell under the table and when he went down to get it, he saw that Sara was not wearing underwear. Dave got back up and went to kitchen to get some refreshment. Sara followed her into the kitchen and asked, "did you like what you saw under there?". Shocked by her boldness, Dace hesitantly replied positively. Sara then said, "you can have it but it costs $500" Dave agreed to pay that sum for it. S…

Mike and his wife Sara went to the state fair every year, and every year Mike would say, "Sara, I'd like to ride in that airplane.".... Sara always replied, "I know, Mike, but that airplane ride costs fifty dollars, and fifty dollars is fifty dollars." One year Mike and Sara went to the fair, and Mike said, "Sara, I'm eighty-five years old. If I don't ride that airplane, I might never get another chance." Sara replied, "Mike, that airplane ride costs fifty dollars, and fifty dollars is …

Whats similar between a hurricane and women? They come in hot and wet and leave with **THE LAWN CHAIRS WE BOUGHT TOGETHER SARA YOU BITCH!**

Maths teacher: If you have 12 chocolates and you give 5 to Sara, 3 to Sandy and 2 to Kristina then what will u get???? Kid: 3 New Girlfriends Mam!!!