#sandy

Wife [walking into house]: Ummm.. Me: [recreating "You Better Shape Up Scene" from Grease with my dog dressed as Sandy]: You're home early.

Who names hurricanes? Are people actually supposed to be intimidated by something named Sandy?

An illustrious Count, Wictor Oblodowsky, agrees to conduct Beethoven's 9th Symphony in a Baltimore gym. He's hesitant at first. He'd only been to America once before, and it was a favor for a friend. The oboist in his orchestra kindly loaned him the first season of The Wire, but the Count never watched it, as he'd never gotten around to buying a DVD player. After an uneventful flight and some trouble getting the timpani through customs, the weary orchestra checks into their hotel. The performanc…

What do you call a punch that can kill 20 kids and 6 adults? A Sandy Hook.

What do you call a dog on the beach? Sandy Claws Merry Christmas

What do you call a 5 year old kid with no friends? A Sandy Hook survivor All they wanted was books but instead they got magazines

My bartender offered me a new drink last night called a ""Sandy."" It's a watered-down Manhattan.

A mom has three kids: snowflake, sandy and brickie... Snowflake comes to her and says ""mommy, why am I called snowflake?"", the mom says ""because when you were born a little snowflake fell on your head..."" Then Sandy comes around and asks ""mommy mommy, why is my name Sandy?"" ""because when you were born, there was a sandstorm and you got a little bit of sand in your face"" Then brickie appears out of nowhere and says ""momomommy whhsy imruaj bricksusiejen?""

What did Sandy Hook elementary get in the mail instead of new books? Empty Magazines.

Miss Bishop was teaching her class of 6-year olds. ""Sandy, can you spell cat?"" she asked. ""C-A-T"" said Sandy. ""Well done, Sandy. Tommy, can you spell dog?"" ""D-O-G, Miss"" replied Tommy.""Well done, Tommy!"" she said. ""Abdullah, can you spell racial discrimination?""

Poor kids at sandy hook... They wished for books but they just got magazines.

CHRISMAS CRAKER What does Santa suffer from if he gets stuck in a chimney? Claustrophobia! Why does Santa have three gardens? So he can 'ho ho ho'! Why did Santa's helper see the doctor? Because he had a low ""elf"" esteem! What kind of motorbike does Santa ride? A Holly Davidson! What do you call a cat in the desert? Sandy Claws! Who delivers presents to cats? Santa Paws! What do you call a dog who works for Santa? Santa Paws!

I feel bad for the kids at Sandy Hook... They wanted books but instead they got magazines

What do you call it when a girl named ""Sandy"" Punches someone? Sandy hook.

Lonely Second Graders What do you call a second grader with no friends? A Sandy Hook survivor

What do you call a 5 year old with no friends? A Sandy Hook survivor I'm sorry....

Have you heard about the new drink, the hurricane Sandy? It's a watered down Manhattan.

Old Sandy McPherson was dying. Tenderly, his wife Maggie knelt by his bedside and asked, 'Anything I can get you, Sandy?' No reply. 'Have ye no' a last wish, Sandy?' Faintly, came the answer ... 'A wee bit of yon boiled ham.' 'Wheesht, man,' said Maggie, 'ye ken fine that's for the funeral.

What do you call a little kid with no friends? A Sandy Hook survivor.

What kind of punch hurts the most? A Sandy Hook.

What would you call Osama bin Laden if he became a pirate? Sandy Hook.

what did a crab say to another crab on christmas hey sandy claws

What does a lion at the beach have in common with Christmas? (as told by my first grade daughter) They both have Sandy Claws. BOOM!

Today's Word is ""Definitely"" One day in a grade 3 classroom, the teacher was explaining the meaning of the word ""definitely"". T: Alright class, let's use definitely in a sentence. Jimmy raises his hand. J: The sky is definitely blue. T: Well Jimmy, sometimes the sky is orange, or black, or yellow...someone else? Sandy raises her hand. S: A tree is definitely green. T: Well Sandy, during the Fall, a tree's leaves can change all sorts of colours like brown, red and orange...someone else? Bobby…

There is a drink called sandy It's a watered down manhattan.