#john-mccain

I wonder if John McCain plays with plastic Army men and pretends he's President at home.

Obama goes to an elementary school to talk to the kids... Obama goes to an elementary school to talk to the kids to get a little PR. After his talk he offers question time. One little boy puts up his hand and Obama asks him his name. "" Stanley ,"" responds the little boy. ""And what is your question, Stanley ?"" ""I have 4 questions: First, why did the USA Bomb Libya without the support of Congress? Second, why are you President when John McCain got more votes? Third, whatever happened to Osama…

Hillary Clinton and John McCain have a debate... I've seen a couple of versions of this joke but nothing recently on here - maybe I'm wrong.... Hillary Clinton and John McCain have a debate at a local college. During a break both go back for some coffee. Clinton, repulsed by McCain's over principled conservatism says ""Sir, if I was your wife, I'd put poison in your coffee"". McCain, appalled by Clinton's unbridled liberalism replies, ""Madam, if I was your husband - I would drink it!"".

Sore Mccain My arms are so sore from the gym. I feel like John Mccain after the Vietnam War.

Topical Jokes (5/20) Welcome back, everybody! We've got some more news and, thus, more jokes. Let's get started. Right off the bat, more on President Obama. Following a week of scandals, President Obama played golf with Transportation Secretary Ray LaHood. Things got a little tense when Obama had IRS agents audit LaHood's claim that it only took him two strokes to clear the hole 17 bunker. Interesting story, the Dalai Lama recently gave a commencement speech in the US. It was at this University …

The 2008 US presidential election was too close to call. Neither the Republican nor the Democrat candidate had enough votes to win. There was talk about ballot recounts and court challenges, but finally both parties decided on a week-long ice-fishing competition, at the end of which whoever caught the most fish would be declared President. The contest was to take place on a frozen lake in North Minnesota. There were to be no observers present and both John McCain and Barack Obama were to go out …

Sarah Palin's chief adviser burst excitedly into her office one morning. "Governor," he beamed. "Some great news at last. Have you seen today's newspapers?" "I saw that there was a sale on at Bloomingdale's." "No, even better than that. According to a new post-election survey, people want you to run for President in 2012." The news was music to her ears. She stood up proudly and announced: "You mean I am the chosen one, the woman of the people? You say that thousands of Republicans have been ple…

John McCain, Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama all died and went to Heaven. God looked down from his throne and asked McCain: "Do you think you deserve to be in Heaven?" McCain took a breath and replied: "Well, I think so because I was a great leader and tried to follow the words in your great book." God looked down and told McCain: "You can sit to my left side." McCain took his seat, and then God asked the same question to Hillary Clinton: "Do you think you deserve to be in Heaven?" Hillary thou…

Florida I just had to fly down to Florida. But it was half business, half pleasure. I had to put my mother in a nursing home. Dave Attell You Know You're From Florida When . . . The four seasons are: almost summer, summer, not summer but still hot, and February. You're on first-name terms with the hurricane lists. You can tell the difference between fire ant bites and mosquito bites. Most of your neighbours are so old they referred to John McCain as "young man". You have a drawer full of bathing…