#alaska

A lumberjack just starts his job in Alaska... So a lumberjack just starts his job in Alaska and it's been a while since he's been with a woman. So one day

A Texan is getting drunk in a bar in Alaska... and he starts to brag about how great Texas is.

Q:How do you tell the time in Antarctica?,"A:I don't know Alaska guy and tell you

What is a Minnesotan's favorite state to vacation in?,"It's Alaska don'Juneau.

If Mississippi asked Missouri for her New Jersey, what would Delaware?","Idaho either but Alaska!

If Mississippi gave Missouri her New Jersey, what would Delaware? I don't know but Alaska

What do you call an emotionally unstable animal who lives in alaska and vacations in antarctica? A BIPOLAR BEAR

What Did Delaware? -She wore her New Jersey! Why did California? -She called to ask Hawaii. Where did Chicago? -The same place Oregon Where has Oregon? I don't know but Alaska. She said she went to pay her Texas. What did Missisip? She sipped a Minnesota. What did Tennessee? The same thing Arkansas How did Wisconsin? He robbed an Oklahoma using a Kentucky.

Why did the fisherman want to go fishing in Alaska? Just for the halibut.

What's the most dangerous animal in Alaska? Sarah Palin

How do Russians drive to Alaska? By bearing straight

What do lesbians in Alaska sing? What would you do ew ew in a Klondike bar.

Why don't hipsters live in Alaska? Everything is cool there already.

What is a Minnesotan's favorite state to vacation in? It's Alaska, don'Juneau.

Why is a physicist's dream vacation in Alaska? Because of all the cold fission it has.

If Mississippi asked Missouri for her New Jersey, what would Delaware? Idaho either, but Alaska!

How do you piss off a Texan? Cut Alaska in two and make Texas the third largest state!

Who did Alaska vote for? Berrrnie Sanders H/T: wife

What does Sarah Palin eat when she's high? Baked Alaska

Why the largest state in US has their own Airlines? Alaska

How do you make a 'feature wall' in Alaska? With a shotgun suicide.

When travelling between Russia and Alaska, you must first get your Bering Strait. Opening a new funeral parlour can be quite an undertaking.

While tending the hand wound of an old Texas rancher, a doctor struck up conversation with him and pretty soon the topic turned to Sarah Palin and her bid to become Vice-President of the United States. The old rancher said: "Palin is what I call a post turtle." Not being familiar with the term, the doctor asked him what a "post turtle" was. The rancher said: "When you're driving down a country road and you come across a fence post with a turtle balanced on top, that's a post turtle." The doctor …

How many climate sceptics does it take to change a lightbulb? None. It's too early to say if the lightbulb needs changing. Attempting to recycle Marmite jars while Alaska is being drilled for oil – it's like turning up at an earthquake with a dustpan and brush. Sean Lock

Two Eskimos were chatting. One said: "Where did your mother come from?" "Alaska." "Don't bother, I'll ask her myself!" What do you get when you cross an Eskimo and a Mexican? A snowblower that doesn't work.