#third-girl

Three girls meet on the first day of school. They ask each other what their names are. The first girl says in a sweet voice ""My parents named me rose, because when my mummy was pregnant, a petal from a rose drifted down and landed on her tummy."" The second girl says softly ""My parents called me violet, because when my mummy was pregnant, the petal from a violet floated down on to her tummy."" Then they both turn to the third girl who screams ""MY NAMES BRICK!""

There once were three girls who were ugly. So they decided to do something about it. They went to a plastic surgeon first to see what their options were. ""It's hopeless, "" he said,"" You guys are too ugly."" ""We're girls, "" they said. ""But...there is a way. There's a magic lake that can change your appearance to whomever or whatever you want to look like. All you have to do is jump and shout the name off of the bridge. But be careful because it only works once"" So the girls went to the bri…

Finding the ""perfect"" one... An extraordinarily handsome man decided he had the God-given responsibility to marry the perfect woman so they could produce children beyond comparison. With that as his mission he began searching for the perfect woman. After a diligent, but fruitless, search up and down the east coast, he started to head west. Shortly thereafter he met a farmer who had three stunning, gorgeous daughters that positively took his breath away. So he explained his mission to the farme…

Modern Pedophiles A pedophile sits in his van outside a middle school, to try and get 'lucky' with some of the girls just getting out of class. The first girl walks across the streets from school and he says, ""Hey honey, could you come here, I need directions."" She responds she doesn't talk to strangers and keeps walking. The second girl walks across the streets from school and he says, ""Hey honey, could you come here, I'm trying to find the nearest grocery store."" She responds she isn't com…

three daughters There was this dad that was an owner of a morgue that had three daughters. The dad went and picked up this guy from a heart attack. The dad told the three girls that they needed to fix and prep him for tomorrow. Well the first girl got a look at him and said he was a really charming looking guy. She pulled back his sheet and noticed he had a hard on. She thought to herself the only way to get this down was to ""ride"" him. So without hesitation she jumped on and rode him for thir…

""An extraordinarily handsome man decided he had the responsibility to marry the perfect woman so they could produce beautiful children beyond compare. With that as his mission he began to search for the perfect woman. Shortly there after he met a Redneck who had three stunning ,gorgeous daughters that positively took his breath away. So he explained his mission to the Redneck and asked for permission to marry one of them. The Redneck simply replied, ""They're lookin' to get married, so you came…

A guy admired the hair of three girls. He walked by one and asked ""How'd you get such lovely blonde hair"" Taking her hand and gently running it through her hair the girl answered ""It's natural."" The guy walked by the second girl and asked ""How'd you get such pretty brown hair?"" Fluffing her hair the second girl said ""It's natural."" Finally the guy approached the third girl and asked ""How'd you get such cool green hair?"" Taking her hand and rubbing it up past her nose then skimmin…

Andy: ""Doc I had the worst dream of my life last night. I dreamed I was with twelve of the most beautiful chorus girls in the world. Blondes brunettes redheads all dancing in a row."" Doctor: ""Hold it Andy. That doesn't sound so terrible."" Andy: Oh yeah? In the dream I was the third girl from the end.""

wee bit perfectionist An extraordinarily handsome man decided he had the responsibility to marry the perfect woman so they could produce beautiful children beyond comparison. With that as his mission he began searching for the perfect woman. Shortly thereafter he met a farmer who had three stunning, gorgeous daughters that positively took his breath away. So he explained his mission to the farmer, asking for permission to marry one of them. The farmer simply replied, "They're lookin' to get m…

Three girls die and go to heaven... They are greeted by st. Peter at the pearly gates. He welcomes them and then says "But be careful, there are lots of ducks in heaven. If you step on any you will be punished". The girls go in and the first one steps on a duck right away and the ugliest man in existence gets chained to her for eternity. The second girl steps on a duck after about a week and the second ugliest man is chained to her for eternity. The third girl, however, never steps on a duck an…

Three girls are vacationing in Romania when they come across a gypsy The gypsy says, "I'll bet you 20 leu each that I can guess which country you're visiting from just by looking at you." The girls think there's no way this hack gypsy can tell where they're from just by looking, so they take the bet. The gypsy scans them for a few seconds and says, "you're all American." The first girl says, "damn, it was probably because of our accents!" The second girl says, "damn, it was probably because …

A woman is walking home with her daughters. The eldest daughter turns to her and asks, "Mummy, how did I get my name?" "Well sweetie, when we were bringing you home from the hospital, a rose petal landed on your head! So that's why we named you Rose.” The second daughter, now curious, asks the same question. "Well darling, when we were bringing you home from the hospital, a lily petal landed on your head! So that's why we named you Lily." The third girl asks "HHGHGNGHGHNG?!?!?! DDDNBHGHBHNG…

Three girls are sitting at a bar talking about how loose they are The first girl says ""I'm so loose my boyfriend can get three fingers inside of me"". The second girl says ""I'm so loose MY boyfriend can get his whole fist in me."" The third girl just smiles and slowly slides down the bar stool.

Three engineers boarded a crowded bus and somehow managed to work their way to the middle of the vehicle where they found three girls willing to exchange their seats for a place on the guys' laps. After travelling like that for several minutes, the first girl asked the man on whose lap she was perched: "Are you by any chance an electrical engineer?" "Yes, I am," he replied, surprised. "How did you know?" "Easy," she said cheekily. "I'm getting shocked by your soldering iron." A few minutes later…