#colorado

High heels are just regular heels that live in Colorado Haha we make jokes on here to try to keep the enveloping darkness at bay

I would bring my dog a nice jerky treat from Colorado, but he only eats local, sustainable cat turds.

A new study found that legalizing marijuana in Colorado has created more than 10,000 jobs...by keeping Taco Bell open 24 hours.

Good for Christian Bale, visiting the victims of the Aurora, Colorado massacre. I heard some of them even got to meet Heath Ledger.

TIL the USS Colorado made nearly 12,000 career dives during WWII- significantly more than most modern submarines- and sunk the last Japanese warship of the war! Sorry, wrong sub :(

Why is the beef in Colorado so good? Because the steaks are high.

What do you get when you combine someone from Colorado and someone from Idaho? A Baked Potato

As a Hilary supporter in Colorado, I'm still happy with the outcome of the election. Since proposition 106 passed I can legally kill myself now that trump won.

Maraijuana Inspector A DEA inspector is visiting a farm in Colorado. He introduces himself to the farmer and says ""I am here to inspect your farm for maraijuana cultivation"". The farmer say ""sure you can look around, just DON'T GO to the farm behind the BARN."" The inspector is FURIOUS, whips out his badge and shoves it in the farmers face, "" YOU SEE THIS? THIS is the seal of the US GOVERNMENT, I can DO whatever I want, INSPECT whichever farm I want."" The farmer is ""OK, sorry to bother you…

My friend lives in Colorado and told me he wanted to start growing weed on his cow farm. I told him it wasn't a good idea. The steaks would be too high.

THE BLONDE AND THE COW A blonde city girl named Amy marries a Colorado rancher. One morning, on his way out to check on the cows, the rancher says to Amy, ""'The insemination man is coming over to impregnate one of our cows today, so I drove a nail into the 2 by 4 just above where the cow's stall is in the barn. Please show him where the cow is when he gets here, OK?"" The rancher leaves for the fields. After a while, the artificial insemination man arrives and knocks on the front door. Amy take…

In Colorado you're American In Juarez you're a Mexican. In the bathroom European.

I went to a pot bar in Colorado this post weekend It was really a seedy joint.

The obligatory ""cattle guard"" joke for the next president Stolen from [Snopes](http://www.snopes.com/politics/humor/cattleguards.asp) For those of you who have never traveled to the west, or southwest, cattle guards are horizontal steel rails placed at fence openings, in dug-out places in the roads adjacent to highways (sometimes across highways), to prevent cattle from crossing over that area. For some reason the cattle will not step on the ""guards,"" probably because they fear getting their…

Three young bakers walk into the bakery. Three young baked bakers walk into the bakery, seeking knowledge and wisdom. As they walk in, they smell the sweet aromas of freshly baked goods, as they were baking and becoming completely baked. They soon find the master chief baker, a blood member of the babeke tribe which is native to colorado. As they seek knowledge from the master baker, an argument breaks out. The first baked baker states, the vape is the best way to smoke. The second baker argues,…

I'm going to stop eating beef from Colorado The steaks are too high

I wonder if the Colorado Planned Parenthood shooter had a Plan B?

what does a cowboy from colorado wear? a 420-gallon hat

Colorado changed the name of Christmas to Juana. ""Merry Juana!""

I'm 10 times more likely to get mugged in Colorado than I am in New York City. Because I don't live in New York City.

I'm going skiing in Colorado. They say there are a lot of blacks there. But there are a lot of blues and greens as well, so I should be okay.

What do you call a Frenchman in Colorado? A French Fried

The Rocky Mountains Ever since Colorado passed amendment 64, legalizing marijuana, there have been talks of renaming the Rocky Mountains to the Stoney Mountains.

A cowboy walks into a bar... A cowboy, who just moved to Wyoming from Texas , walks into a bar and orders three mugs of Bud. He sits in the back of the room, drinking a sip out of each one in turn. When he finishes them, he comes back to the bar and orders three more. The bartender approaches and tells the cowboy, ""You know, a mug goes flat after I draw it. It would taste better if you bought one at a time."" The cowboy replies, ""Well, you see, I have two brothers. One is in Arizona , the othe…

What do people in Colorado eat on 3/14/15? Pot pie.