#susie

Susie Lee Done Fell In Love Susie Lee done fell in love; She planned to marry Joe. She was so happy 'bout it all She told her Pappy so. Pappy told her, ""Susie gal, You'll have to find another. I'd just as soon yo' Ma don't know, But Joe is yo' half brother."" So Susie put aside her Joe And planned to marry Will. But after telling Pappy this, He said, ""There's trouble still... You cain't marry Will, my gal, And please don't tell your Mother, But Will and Joe and several mo' I know is yo' half b…

It's the first day of 3rd grade... Their teacher wanted them to behave more grown up since they were no longer in second grade. As such, the teacher told them to use grownup words instead of baby words. She then asked them to tell her what they did during the summer. Susie went first and said she went to see her Nana. The teacher said, 'No, no, you went to see your grandmother. Use the grown-up word.' Next Samantha said she went for a trip on a choo-choo. Once again the teacher again said, 'No, …

There were two sisters... Once upon a time, in the wild, wild West there were two sisters, Jill and Susie. A relative of theirs dies and leaves the two sisters a ranch. The ranch was run down and they had little else to their name besides the ranch so they thought they'd invest what they had left into a stud bull to mate with their cows. They found an ad in the paper for a healthy bull for sale for $500 and decided Jill would go down and see if the bull would be suitable and Susie would stay bac…

Use the word definitely in a sentence A teacher of a grade three class is teaching her class about the word definitely. Towards the end of class the teacher asks the class to use definitely correctly in a sentence. A boy named Tom puts his hand up first. ""Tree leaves are definitely green."" ""That is incorrect because during Fall leaves can turn red and orange."" replies the teacher. A girl named Susie puts her hand up next. ""The sky is definitely blue."" ""That is also incorrect because durin…

Helpful Daughter Little Susie, a six year old , complained:""Mother, I've got a stomach ache."" ""That's because our stomach is empty"", the mother replied. ""You would feel better if you had something in it."" That afternoon her daddy came complaining that he had a severe headache all day. Susie perked up: "" That's because it's empty"", she said. ""You'd feel better if you had something in it.""

A teenage boy shows up at his prom date's house for the big evening The girl's father meets him at the door, and asks him into his den to have a chat. The father closes the door and explains to the teen that his daughter is very precious to him, and he doesn't want anything to happen to her. As he finishes his sentence, he opens his gun case and pulls out a 10 gauge shotgun, aiming it at the teen. The kid's eyes go wide in panic, and the father tells him to drop his pants and jerk off. The teen …

The value of a Catholic education and a #2 pencil. Little Susie was not the best student in Catholic School . Usually she slept through the class. One day her teacher, a Nun, called on her while she was sleeping. 'Tell me Susie, who created the universe?' When Susie didn't stir, little Johnny who was her friend sitting behind her, took his pencil and jabbed her in the rear. 'God Almighty!' shouted Susie. The Nun said, 'Very good' and continued teaching her class.. A little later the Nun asked Su…

Why did little Susie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

Little Susie Why did little Susie fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms. Knock knock. *Who's there?* Not little Susie.

Kids parents jobs One day in class the teacher asked the kids what their dads did for a job. The teacher first asked little Albert what his dad did... ""My dads a fireman"" said Albert The teacher then asked little Susie... ""My dads a police officer"" said Susie The teacher then asked little johnny what his dad did... ""My dads dead"" said johnny The teacher then asked ""well what did he do before he died"" Little johnny said ""he turned green and shat on the carpet""

Little Johnny's at it again.... A teacher asks her class, ""What do you want to be when you grow up?"" Little Johnny says ""I wanna be a billionaire, going to the most expensive clubs, take the best bitch with me, give her a Ferrari worth over a million bucks, an apartment in Hawaii, a mansion in Paris, a jet to travel through Europe, an Infinite Visa Card and to make love to her three times a day"". The teacher, shocked, and not knowing what to do with the bad behavior of the child, decides not…

I heard Jared lost about 7 inches. .. But little Susie isn't sure.

GOD'S DEAD DOG - joke :DD Mom and Dad were trying to console Susie whose dog, Skipper, had recently died. ""You know,"" Mom said, ""it's not so bad. Skipper's probably up in Heaven right now, having a grand old time with God."" Susie stopped crying and asked, ""What would God want with a dead dog?""

Susie Susie Susie ... Oh A teacher was reviewing her class's homework assignment. She asked Susie to stand up and tell the class what part of the human body enlarges to seven times its original size when stimulated. Susie stood up, shuffled her feet and said, ""Well, I think I know, but I'm too embarrassed to tell you."" The teacher said, ""Sit down, Susie. Johnny, tell the class what part of the human body enlarges to seven times its size when stimulated."" Johnny said, ""That's easy. The pupil…

Little Susie goes to the doctor... Little Susie goes to the doctor. Doctor puts a stethoscope on her back and says, ""Ok now, big breathes."" Susie says, ""I know! And I'm only 12!""

Little Johnny jokes A teacher asks her class, ""What do you want to be when you grow up?"" Little Johnny says ""I wanna be a billionaire, going to the most expensive clubs, take the best bitch with me, give her a Ferrari worth over a million bucks, an apartment in Hawaii, a mansion in Paris, a jet to travel through Europe, an Infinite Visa Card and to make love to her three times a day"". The teacher, shocked, and not knowing what to do with the bad behavior of the child, decides not to give imp…

Hi. I am here. First post, go easy on me. Mom and Dad were trying to console Susie whose dog, Skipper, had recently died. ""You know,"" Mom said, ""it's not so bad. Skipper's probably up in Heaven right now, having a grand old time with God."" Susie stopped crying and asked, ""What would God want with a dead dog?""

Vocabulary lesson Every Tuesday Mrs. Smith teaches her third grade class a new vocabulary word. This weeks word is ""definitely."" ""Can any of you use the word 'definitely' in a sentence?"" A small hand goes up in the front of the class, and little Susie says, ""The sky is definitely blue!"" ""Close"" replies the teacher, ""but sometimes the sky is orange, or purple, or even pink. Anyone else? Another small hand goes up, and billy says, ""The tree is definitely green!"" ""Close"" replies the te…

Susie 1 - Why did Susie fall off the swing? 2 - Because she had no arms 1 - Knock Knock 2 - Who's there? 1 - Not Susie

Little Susie is talking to her grandmother after her grandfather's funeral.... Susie, after her grandfather's funeral, goes to comfort her grandmother. ""Grandma,"" she asks,"" do you miss grandpa? ""Oh I miss him very much, but I know he's in a better place, and that he died doing something he loved very much."" Grandma replies, wiping away a tear. ""What was he doing?"" Susie wonders out loud. Grandma being rather old replies proudly ""Well each Sunday we'd spend the afternoon making sweet lov…

A dirty limerick I made up today ... I once met a girl named Susie. And, boy, was she a doozie! She loved me right, Made it last all night! And in the morning she blew me!

Racial Discrimination A black boy, James, was in class one day and the teacher asked, ""Class, what did you do this weekend?"" Immediately, a girl raises her hand and says, ""I went over to Sam's house to play in his sandbox!"" ""Oh interesting, come up to the board and spell sand, and Sam, come up here and spell box! I'll give you a cookie each!"" After they're done, the teacher asks again and James raises his hand timidly. ""I saw Susie going to Sam's house and I wanted to play too so I asked …

Old chemistry groaner. The teacher was giving her class an oral test. First she asked Little Susie: ""What's Al2O3?"" Susie: ""Alumina!"" The teacher said, ""Correct!"", then turned to Little Johnny and asked, ""Johnny, now, can you tell me what's Fe2O3?"" Johnny: ""Uh ... Philomena?""

Dream Big A teacher asks her class, ""What do you want to be when you grow up?"" Little Johnny says ""I wanna be a billionaire, going to the most expensive clubs, take the best bitch with me, give her a Ferrari worth over a million bucks, an apartment in Hawaii, a mansion in Paris, a jet to travel through Europe, an Infinite Visa Card and to make love to her three times a day"". The teacher, shocked, and not knowing what to do with the bad behavior of the child, decides not to give importance to…

Poor Susie! Q: Why couldn't Susie ride the swings? A: Because she has no arms! Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie!