#jill

The tragedy of Jack & Jill is they went *up* the hill to get water. You get water from the *bottom* of a hill. Stupidity killed them.

Tonite on House Hunters: Jill wants 4 bedrooms, granite countertops and a home spa. Bob wants to be stabbed in the driveway.

Each one of us has a secret. My secret is that I can't keep a secret. Also Jill is a lesbian.

Jack & Jill went up the hill, for a bit of privacy. Jill lifted her dress, to Jack's distress there was something there she hadn't confessed

"Chill out." - Spanish receptionist saying Jill isn't in.

Jack and Jill went up the hill To fetch an ounce of ganja Jack lit up and took a puff And Jill cuffed him. She was DEA. Jack died in prison.

Hub: Still mad? Me: Jack & Jill went up the hill H: To fetch a pail of water M: Jack fell down & died a violent death Hub: Ok, still mad

Jill on Facebook is trying to find a way to get cat diarrhea out of suede boots and I don't think I'm hungry for lunch anymore. .

There were two sisters... Once upon a time, in the wild, wild West there were two sisters, Jill and Susie. A relative of theirs dies and leaves the two sisters a ranch. The ranch was run down and they had little else to their name besides the ranch so they thought they'd invest what they had left into a stud bull to mate with their cows. They found an ad in the paper for a healthy bull for sale for $500 and decided Jill would go down and see if the bull would be suitable and Susie would stay bac…

The Three Daughters There once was a very successful farmer with 3 beautiful daughters daughters, all in high school. It was a Friday night, and they all had dates. The farmer, wanting to protect his girls, made sure to talk to the boys before letting his daughters out to go on the dates. The first boy came to the house and greeted the farmer. ""Hi! My name is Bill, I'm here to pick up Jill so we can go have a picknick on the hill."" The farmer got Jill and the couple left. A few minutes later, …

Jack was going to be married to Jill ... so the night before the wedding his father sits him down for a little fireside chat. ""Jack, let me tell you something. On my wedding night in our honeymoon suite, I took off my pants and handed them to your mother, and said, ""Here, try these on."" So, she did and said: ""These are too big, I can't wear them.'"" So I replied: ""Damn right! I wear the pants in this family and always will."" Ever since that night we have never had any problems."" Jack thou…

Jack and Jill went up the hill, to smoke some marijuana, Jack got high, pulled down his fly, and asked Jill if she wanna. Jill said yes, pulled up her dress, and had a little fun, but stupid Jill, forgot the pill, and now they have a son. Note: Not original; oldie but a goodie

Jack and Jill work together in an office... Things are getting very slow and the manager realizes he has to let one of them go but he can't decide. The manager approaches Jill and says ""I have to lay you or Jack off"". ""Jack off!"" snaps Jill ""I have a headache"".

Jack and Jill went up the hill.... And Jill came back with an IPhone 7

What's wrong with the sentence ""Jack and Jill is playing in the field?"" Women should be first.

Jack and Jill went up a hill;   to have a bit of fun.   But stupid Jill forgot the pill;   and now they have a son.

What does a blonde do when her car endures a hail storm? Jill woke up one morning after a hail storm that night. Her car had dents all over it. It was incredibly bad damage, so she brought it into a local auto repair to get the dents fixed. The mechanic, noticing that Jill was blonde, thought he would have a little fun. He simply told her that there is an easy solution to this dent problem of hers! He instructed her, ""go home and blow into the tailpipe of your car really really hard and all the…

Netflix and chill is cool... But let's be honest guys, we know for most of you it's Netflix and Jill Edit: if you don't know who Jill is, take a look at your hand.

Jack and Jill went up a hill to fetch a pail of water. God knows what they did up there because they came down with a daughter.

Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water. Jack's pants were a little loose and his pants fell down. Jill looked at down and said ""Hey, what's that thing?"" ""I don't know,"" said Jack, ""I'll go ask my dad."" That night, Jack asked his dad what the thing in his pants was. ""That's your car,"" said Jack's dad, ""you gotta park it in as many garages as you can."" Jack and Jill went back up the hill the next day. Jill asked Jack, ""So what did your dad say?"" ""He said it's my car,"…

Jack and jill So Jack and Jill finally made it up the hill and they climb a willow tree at the top. After an hour or so Jack has to poop so he tells Jill he has to poop and will be gone awhile. 35 minutes pass and Jill is like wow it's taking him a long time I better go check on him. She walks up and sees Jack passed out in his own crap. Jill thinks dang I can play a great joke on him and she sees a deer carcass. Jill then spread deer guts all around Jack. She was laughing thinking about how he …

Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pale of water. I don't know what they did up there, but they came back with a daughter.

Two women are waiting to get into Heaven Both are in their mid-30's with a lot in common. They introduce themselves as Carol and Jill and quickly become good friends. After some time, Jill finally asks the big question. ""So how did you end up here?"" Carol takes some time before she answers. ""Well, I had been married for five years and my husband started to act strange over the past month. I find out that he was cheating on me and since he worked at home, I decided to catch him in the act by c…

The appointment. Jack wakes up one morning next to Jill. He's feeling amorous and starts caressing her and tugging at her pyjama bottoms. She groans and says, ""oh... not now, honey. You know I have a gynecologist appointment this morning...."" Jack rolls over resignedly. After a few minutes he turns back toward her and says, ""umm... you don't have a dentist appointment, do you?""

WHY CAN'T YOU BE LIKE THAT? Jill tells her husband, ""Jack, that young couple that just moved in next door seem such a loving twosome. Every morning, when he leaves the house, he kisses her goodbye, and every evening when he comes homes, he brings her a dozen roses. Now, why can't you do that?"" ""Gosh,"" Jack says, ""why I hardly know the girl."" [Source](http://smile.xonaki.com/Joke/EN?categoryCode=EN&jokeId=161#mainBody)