#joey

FRIENDS reunion (2016) RACHEL: [texting from bar] sry smthg came up CHANDLER: [texting from home] same... work JOEY: [in LA] wait THIS friday?

You know that episode of Friends where Joey tries to speak French? That's what I hear when watching the State of the Union Address

DOCTOR: Do you have any questions? "Can I shower with this cast?" DOCTOR: What do you think, guys? PHOEBE, JOEY, CHANDLER, MONICA: Sure!

That moment you are trying to figure out if you are Joey, Ross, or Chandler and you realize you're Gunther.

[Post fight interview w/ boxer Joey "poor choice of words" Stevens] Joey: "I just couldn't get that guy to go down on me."

I'm not racist. Some of my best friends are white such as Joey, Phoebe and Rachel. And I can't forget Chandler.

""KimKylieKendallKourtneyKhloeNewYorkCitySpiderMan"" Was Joey's Password... ""KimKylieKendallKourtneyKhloeNewYorkCitySpiderMan"" was Joey's password. When his friend Ross asked why the long password, Joey replied, ""Because the website said: 5 characters, a capital, and a special character

A kid shows up to class with $2,467... The kids filed back into class Monday morning. They were very excited. Their weekend assignment was to sell something, then give a talk on productive salesmanship. Little Suzie led off: ""I sold girl scout cookies and I made $30,"" she said proudly, ""My sales approach was to appeal to the customer's civil spirit and I credit that approach for my obvious success."" ""Very good,"" said the teacher. Little Vicky was next: ""I sold magazines,"" she said, ""I m…

A guy sticks his head into a barber shop and asks..... ""Hey, Mate! how long before I can get a haircut?"" The barber look around the shop and says ""about 2 hours,"" and the guy leaves. A few days later the same guy sticks his head in the door and asks...""How long before I can get a haircut?"" Again, the barber looks around at shop full of customers and says""about 2 hours."" The guy leaves. A week later the same guy sticks his head in the shop and asks, ""How long before I can get a haircut?"…

Knowing the Difference Joey married one of a pair of identical twin girls. Less than a year later, he was in court filing for a divorce. ""OK,"" the judge said, ""Tell the court why you want a divorce."" ""Well, your honor,"" Joey started, ""Every once in a while my sister in law would come over for a visit, and because she and my wife are so identical looking, every once in a while I`d end up making love to her by mistake."" ""Surely there must be some difference between the two women."" the ju…

Little Joey goes to the circus with his parents At some point during the show, Joey sees a horse on stage and asks: - Mommy what's that thing that's hanging between the horse's legs? - Oh don't mind that, that's nothing honey. Joey's dad looks over at his son with a smirk and says: - You see, I've thought her well.

""Let's take a peek!"" Three boys are playing outside just after dark, when one of them noticed a light on in a window. Billy says to Johnnie and Joey: ""Let's take a peek!"" They look in the window and see a pretty woman undressing. Suddenly, Johnnie runs away and the other boys can't find him. The next day, Billy and Joey see Johnnie and ask: ""Why'd you run away, you some kind of faggot or something?"" Johnnie replies: ""No...My mother told me that if I ever do anything naughty, say anything …

We have got a new baby Mary: We've got a new baby at our house. Terry: Is he going to stay? Mary: I guess so. He brought all his clothes. Willie: Dad, can I have $5 so I can go see Joey next door? Dad: Why do you need $5 to go to see Joey? Willie: Because his mother said he was at the movies!

NSFW Joey rings at his new girlfriends door Her father opens. ""Hi, my name is Joey Tudor, I came over to f#ck your daughter"" ""To whaaaaaaat?"" ""Tudor!"" ... Well it sureley works better in german with the name Umberto, but I hope it translates.

Joey's walking down Main Street when he passes George, and George looks frantic. ""Joey! Joey, you gotta help me,"" says George. ""Why? What's wrong?"" ""It's Phil! He's suicidal! You gotta go talk to him. He just got a job at the new soda pop bottling plant, and it's ruining him."" So Joey rushes down the soda pop plant to talk to Phil. ""Phil! What's wrong? I just saw Joey and he said you were really upset by your new job."" ""What? I don't know why he'd say that. I saw him earlier today, and …

A man was born with an unfortunate name His name was Joey Pizasheet. During grade school, people made fun of him chanting ""Joey Pizasheet. Joey Piece of Shit"". So after constantly hearing this, he finally decided that when he grew older he would change his name. Years went by and Joey went to study law. And he took the bar when he graduated, thus becoming Attorney Pizasheet. Thus he found iut he could change his name at will. So Joey and his buddy went to the courthouse and had his name change…

So, how about a free haircut? A guy sticks his head into a barber shop and asks ""Hey, Buddy! how long before I can get a haircut?"" The barber look around the shop full of customers and says ""about 2 hours,"" and the guy leaves. A few days later the same guy sticks his head in the door and asks...""how long before I can get a haircut?"" Again, the barber looks around at shop full of customers and says ""about 2 hours."" The guy leaves. A week later the same guy sticks his head in the shop and …

Obvious Jokes Q: Why did Joey drop his ice cream? A: Because he was hit by a bus ------------------------------------ Q: How do you get a clown off a swing? A: You hit him with an axe -------------------------------------- Q: What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: ""Where's my tractor?"" A:

Joey the marsupial applied for a job to eat eucalyptus leaves all day. However, he was declined due to his lack of koalafications.

Joey the altar boy goes to confession and says... 'Bless me Father, for I have sinned. I have been with a loose girl'. 'And who was the girl you were with?' 'I can't tell you, Father. I don't want to ruin her reputation'. ""Well, I'm sure to find out her name sooner or later, so you may as well tell me now. Was it Tina Minetti? 'I cannot say.' 'Was it Teresa Mazzarelli?' 'I'll never tell.' 'Was it Nina Capelli?' 'I'm sorry, but I cannot name her.' 'Was it Cathy Piriano?' 'My lips are sealed.' 'W…

An Italian Boy's Confession: 'Bless me Father, for I have sinned. I have been with a loose girl.' The priest asks, 'Is that you, little Joey Pagano?' 'Yes, Father, it is.' 'And who was the girl you were with?' 'I can't tell you, Father, I don't want to ruin her reputation.' "Well, Joey, I'm sure to find out her name sooner or later so you may as well tell me now. Was it Tina Minetti?" 'I cannot say.' 'Was it Teresa Mazzarelli?' 'I'll never tell.' 'Was it Nina Capelli?' 'I'm sorry, but I cannot …

An altar boy enters the box to confess... 'Bless me Father, for I have sinned. I have been with a loose girl.' The priest asks, 'Is that you, little Joey Pagano?' 'Yes, Father, it is.' 'And who was the girl you were with?' 'I can't tell you, Father, I don't want to ruin her reputation.' "Well, Joey, I'm sure to find out her name sooner or later so you may as well tell me now. Was it Tina Minetti?" 'I cannot say.' 'Was it Teresa Mazzarelli?' 'I'll never tell.' 'Was it Nina Capelli?' 'I'm sorry, …

A kid goes to church to confess... "Bless me Father, for I have sinned. I have been with a loose girl." The priest asks, "Is that you, little Joey Pagano?" "Yes, Father, it is." "And who was the girl you were with?" "I can't tell you, Father. I don't want to ruin her reputation." "Well, Joey, I'm sure to find out her name sooner or later so you may as well tell me now. Was it Tina Minetti?" "I cannot say." "Was it Teresa Mazzarelli?" "I'll never tell." "Was it Nina Capelli?" "…

The Bubba Joke--long Bubba is talking to his friend in a bar and boasts to his friend that he knows everyone in the world. His friend, of course, doesn’t believe him. “If you know everyone in the world, name everyone in this bar.” Bubba proceeds to name everyone—Joey, Rachel, Sam, Johnny, Bart, until everyone is named. His friend is impressed, but then says, “Well, you may know everyone here but you can't know everyone—how about Clint Eastwood? Bubba claims he does. So they go to Clint Eastwood…

An Italian Boy's Confession "Bless me Father, for I have sinned. I have been with a loose girl." The priest asks, "Is that you, little Joey Pagano?" "'Yes, Father, it is." "And who was the girl you were with?" "I can't tell you, Father. I don't want to ruin her reputation." "Well, Joey, I'm sure to find out her name sooner or later so you may as well tell me now. Was it Tina Minetti?" "I cannot say." "Was it Teresa Mazzarelli?" "I'll never tell." "Was it Nina Capelli?" "I'm sorry, but…