#ferrari

The Rich Man's Car Door One day, a rich man was walking out from a store, and back to his Ferrari. He reached his car and opened the door. At that very moment, another passing car smashes into his car door, ripping it off its hinges, before zooming away. Upset about the hit and run, the rich man quickly called the police. After a while, a policeman came to examine the scene. He took one look at the rich man and said. ""You know, I think you are overly materialistic. You have been so concerned ab…

Do you smoke cigarettes? Paul: Do you smoke cigarettes? Patrick: Oh yes. Paul: How many sticks a day? Patrick: 7 packs. Paul: When did you start smoking? Patrick: 18 years ago. Paul: How much does a pack cost? Patrick: 10 dollars Paul: So you spent 70 dollars a day on cigarettes? Patrick: Yes. Paul: If you had saved the 70 dollars a day for 18 years, that would be $460,000 and you could be driving your own Ferrari right now. Patrick: Can I ask you a question? Paul: Go ahead. Patrick…

What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I haven't got a Ferrari in my garage

Be Careful What You Wish For... One day a man was waking along the beach when he tripped over a lamp. He turned around and kicked the lamp out of anger. A few seconds later, a genie popped out of the lamp. Reluctantly, the genie said, ""Even though you kicked me, I still have to give you three wishes. However, because of what you did, I will also give twice what you wish for to the person you hate the most: your boss."" So the man agreed and made his first wish. ""I want lots of money"", he said…

[Long] Depressive man meets genie. A depressive man is walking through the park. He's depressed 'cause of the recent divorce he went through. He kicks an old can that's laying in front of him and BANG - there's a Genie who grants him 3 wishes. The sad part is, that for everything he wishes double goes to his ex-wife. The man starts thinking and goes: ""My first wish, is that I own a Ferrari"". *Swhooossh, BANG* There's a Ferrari at just in front of his nose and 2 on the front porch of the ex-wif…

If you had a choice between world piece and a million dollars, what color Ferrari would you buy?

well my 9 year old cousin had a joke too I was expecting something really light and innocent... Him: ""What's the difference between a Ferrari and 10 dead babies?"" Me: ""Uhhh...what?"" Him: ""I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.""

An Indian man walks into a NYC bank and asks for the loan officer. He tells the loan officer that he is going to India for some business for 2 weeks and needs to borrow $5000 The loan officer tells him that the bank will need some form of security for the loan. So the Indian man hands over the keys and the documents to his new Ferrari parked on the street in front of the bank. The loan officer consults the president of the bank, and everything checks out to be OK. The loan officer agrees to acce…

What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

What is the difference between 1000 dead babies and a ferrari? I dont have a ferrari in my garage.

Christmas One day Dan asks Bob, ""So Bob what did you get for Christmas?"" Then Bob says to Dan, ""Oh see that brand new red Ferrari outside?"" Dan says, ""OOOOH WOW!!!"" Bob says, ""Ya, I got the same exact color tie!""

A snail slithers into a Ferrari dealership... He drops a suitcase full of cash on the salesman desk and says ""I want your most powerful Ferrari, bright red, and then paint the letter S all over it. The next day the snail comes to pick up his new custom Ferrari, and the salesman says ""I have to ask, why all the S's on your new car?"" The snail replies ""because when I'm cruising with hot chicks, I want people to say 'look at that S car go!'""

Bank Loan A Chinese walks into a bank in New York City and asks for the loan officer. He tells the loan officer that he is going to Taiwan on business for two weeks and needs to borrow $5,000. The bank officer tells him that the bank will need some form of security for the loan, so the Chinese hands over the keys to a new Ferrari parked on the street in front of the bank. He produces the title and everything checks out. The loan officer agrees to accept the car as collateral for the loan. The ba…

My Love Life is Like my Ferrari... It's nonexistent

The policemen, the driver and the Titanic Two policemen stopped a Ferrari for a routine check. Inside the car were a distinct black man, with curly black hair and raven black eyes. - ""Documents please ... "" The driver shows his license and registration certificate. The patrol leader reads: - ""Name: Leonardo"" Amazed, he looks at the driver. - ""Last Name: DiCaprio"" Even more astonished,he looks again at the driver. - ""Blue eyes, blonde hair ..."" Now, turning to his colleague: - ""Hey Jim, …

Little Johnny's at it again.... A teacher asks her class, ""What do you want to be when you grow up?"" Little Johnny says ""I wanna be a billionaire, going to the most expensive clubs, take the best bitch with me, give her a Ferrari worth over a million bucks, an apartment in Hawaii, a mansion in Paris, a jet to travel through Europe, an Infinite Visa Card and to make love to her three times a day"". The teacher, shocked, and not knowing what to do with the bad behavior of the child, decides not…

Man and woman Woman: Do you drink beer? Man: Yes Woman: How many beers a day? Man: Usually about 3 Woman: How much do you pay per beer? Man: 150 Rs. which includes a tip Woman: And how long have you been drinking? Man: About 20 years, I suppose Woman: So a beer costs 150 Rs. and you have 3 beers a day which puts your spending 450 Rs. each day and each month at 13500 Rs. In one year, it would be approximately 162000 Rs. ...correct? Man: Correct Woman: If in 1 year you spend 162000 Rs., not accoun…

I got arrested for following my dream. The owner of that Ferrari thought I was a hitman shading him.

Babies for dinner What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari? I don't have a ferrari in my garage!

Two Faggots are walking on the beach....when one of them finds a shell in the sand and he wipes off the sand to find a Genie materializes from the smoke. not just a regular Genie, but a hillbilly Genie! with long hair, jean overalls, and a southern accent to boot. He says"" I gotta give you faggots one wish each...so make it quick. So the first faggot whispers in the genies ear, and POOF! a purple Ferrari appears. The first faggot was so delighted, he jumped into the front seat of his car. The s…

If you could choose between world peace and $100,000,000, what color would you choose for your Ferrari?

The Bunny was walking trough the forest with his new, red skateboard The Bunny walks trough the forest with his new, red skateboard. The bear, drunk as hell, sees him and ask ""How can you aford this skateboard, Bunny"" So the bunny says: ""Well, I don't drink my moneys as you do"" And goes away The next day the bunny was walking trough the forest with his new, red, bike. The bear sees him again and ask: ""How can you aford all this, little bunny, you're smaller and gain less then me?"" ""Well, …

A rich man needs a blood transfusion A rich man goes to the doctor and the doctor says he needs a blood transfusion. So the rich man goes to work the next day and tells his Jewish employee & close friend the news. Since they have been very close friends for a long time, the Jewish guy offers him some of his own blood. Right after the transfusion, the rich man goes out and buys his Jewish friend a brand new Ferrari. ""My dear friend, you've kept me alive & well, please take this gift from…

A rich sheik's son goes to Germany to study... ...and his old man receives a letter. It says: ""Hello, father. It's great here! The people are nice, university isn't that hard, and life is pretty good. The only thing which makes me feel kind of bad is that all my friends go to school by train while I drive in my golden Ferrari."" About a week later, the son receives a letter with his father's signature on it. It reads: ""Not to worry my son, I just transferred $300 million onto your bank account…

A man saves up to buy a Ferrari He's been saving every dime, every nickel, every dollar he can, and now he finally has enough to buy a brand new Ferrari in one lump sum. For fun, he decides to withdraw the full amount and pay for the car in cash. He goes to the dealership, goes through all the paperwork, and gives them the money. A few minutes later, the dealer comes out of his office. ""Sir, we have a bit of a problem. You are exactly five cents short of the price."" The man is stunned. ""Come …