#disney

Gimme your best Mickey Mouse/Disney character joke! Going on a Disney Cruise and need your funniest, raunchiest or most nasty joke involving a Disney character.

Rick Astley told me that you could borrow any of his Disney movies, except Up He's never gonna give you Up...

What climate scientist does Disney follow on twitter? The rogue one

Progressives are enraged, conservatives are cautiously optimistic, but no group is more excited than the Imagineers of Disney. For the first time in the history of the Hall of Presidents, they have a shot at making an audioanimatronic more realistic than the original.

A couple driving to Disney World... ...saw signs for the nearby town of Kissimmee. Being unfamiliar with the area, they debated whether it is pronounced KISSimmee or kissIMMee or kissimmEE. The debate turned into an argument and they decided that when they got to the town they would ask one of the locals. So they pulled into a fast food place on the main drag and went inside. Stepping up to the counter, the guy says, ""I know this may sound like an unusual request, but could you please very slow…

Hellen Keller was the first person to go to Disney land. Don't worry, she didn't know it either.

Rick Astley is such a nice guy He'll let you borrow any of his Disney Pixar DVD collection! Except Up! He's Never Gonna Give You Up

I told my 7 year old daughter that there are real princesses... My 7 year old made a comment along the lines of ""I wish princesses were real"" and I replied that they are, they're just not what you think of when you watch fairy-tales and Disney shows. She didn't believe me so I started to look some up on my phone and came across Diana....the following dialogue is verbatim Daughter - ""Oh she's pretty, who's she?"" Me - ""That's Princess Diana, she died in a car wreck years ago though"" Daughter…

What famous American filmmaker lived in a safe? Vault Disney

Rick Astley will let you have any movie from his Disney collection except one He's never gonna give you Up

Two blonds were driving to disneyland. The sign said: Disney left.. So they started crying and headed home.

Last requests After I die, I have 2 requests on what shall happen to me. 1) I want my remains spread around Disney world. 2) I do not wish to be cremated

It was the night before the wife's 40th birthday So the man asked his wife what she'd like for her 40th birthday. ""I'd love to be six again,"" she replied. On the morning of her birthday, he got her up bright and early and off they went to a local theme park. What a day! He put her on every ride in the park: the Death Slide, the Screaming Loop, the Wall of Fear, everything there was! Wow! Five hours later she staggered out of the theme park, her head reeling and her stomach upside down. Right t…

Free admission to Disney On Ice!! Just push your knee against your eyes and you'll get to watch This Knee On Eyes.

I got in line behind an old classmate of mine while vacationing at Disney World... I said ""Wow, it's a small world!"" She said, ""actually this is Pirates of the Caribbean.""

What kind of government does Disney World have? A plutocracy

Disney just announced plans for an animated adaptation of Dante's Inferno They're calling it, ""101 Damnations.""

What did Disney call their remake of Dante's Inferno? 101 damnations

Just seen a Disney trailer. I've just seen a Disney trailer It said, ""A new movie from the people that brought you Up."" Flipping Heck! I never knew Mum and Dad made films.

PSA for vacationing families: Don't let your kids play PokemonGo at Disney. They'll get eaten by wild Feraligatrs.

Donald Trump was interviewed for his list of favorite things. Q: What's your favorite Disney movie? A: Snow White Q: What's your favorite song? A: White Light, White Heat Q: What's your favorite Christmas song? A: White Christmas Q: What's your favorite rock band? A: White Snake Q: What's your favorite movie in general? A: Black Mass Q: That's an interesting break from the pattern. What's it about? A: A guy named Whitey Bulger. Q: (forehead slap)

What have Disney and the U.K. got in common? Both dropped the EU And screwed over a lot of people

Old but gold One day, John visited Rick to borrow some movie to watch. John: ""can i borrow some of your movies?"" Rick: ""Sure thing, just follow me"" John followed rick to a room full of movies from a to z Rick: ""so what are you looking for?"" John: ""oh just some family friendly movies like Disney or Pixar would be nice"" Rick: ""alright then, let me get those movies for you"" Rick picked a handful of movies and started handing them to john one by one Rick: ""so here is Aladdin, cars, findin…

Why did the alligator go to Disney World? To get some tots! #toosoon?

Disney is releasing an alternate version of its latest film for the Indian audience where Nemo's father starts looking for a bride for his son. It's called Finding Dowry.