#chuck-norris

In 1990, Chuck Norris founded the non-profit organization ""Kick Drugs Out of America"". If the organization's name were ""Roundhouse Kick Drugs out of America"", there wouldn't be any drugs in the Western Hemisphere. Period.

Chuck Norris can clear 5 lines at once in tetris.

Chuck Norris can squeeze blood from a stone. He must feed his children.

Chuck Norris can cook minute rice in 20 seconds.

Q: How many Chuck Norris' does it take to change a light bulb? A: None, Chuck Norris prefers to kill in the dark.

Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice

Chuck Norris has a roundhouse-kick app for his iPhone 8.0

He who lives by the sword, dies by the sword. He who lives by Chuck Norris, dies by the roundhouse kick.

Chuck Norris can sneeze with his eyes open.

When Chuck Norris bowls, he moves the Earth so the pins will hit the ball

Long ago, Chuck Norris didn't care about remembering when Jesus' birthday was so he just so happened to send him a birthday card on December 25th. Jesus was to scared to correct Chuck Norris and to this day December 25th is known as Christmas.

Chuck Norris won the Origami Championship in 1983...folding a rock

Chuck Norris got in touch with his feminine side, and promptly got her pregnant.

Chuck norris once put a forest fire out by spitting on it.

Surprisingly, the only Street Fighter II move based on one of Chuck Norris' was Chun-Li's. Chuck Norris prefers to travel by performing four upside-down double-roundhouse kicks per second.

Some people ask for a Kleenex when they sneeze, Chuck Norris asks for a body bag.

Chuck Norris know's Victoria's Secret.

Chuck Norris is the reason for JAL flight 123

If a tree falls in the forest, does anybody hear? Yes. Chuck Norris hears it. Chuck Norris can hear everything. Chuck Norris can hear the shrieking terror in your soul.

Who let the dogs out? Chuck Norris let the dogs out...... and then roundhouse kicked them through an Oldsmobile.

""Brokeback Mountain"" is not just a movie. It's also what Chuck Norris calls the pile of dead ninjas in his front yard.

The day you introduce your mom to Chuck Norris, is the day you mom introduces you to your biological father.

The original title for Alien vs. Predator was Alien and Predator vs Chuck Norris. The film was cancelled shortly after going into preproduction. No one would pay nine dollars to see a movie fourteen seconds long.

Leading hand sanitizers claim they can kill 99.9 percent of germs. Chuck Norris can kill 100 percent of whatever he wants.

The fences at the zoo are to keep the animals safe from Chuck Norris.