#bill-gates

If Bill Gates had a dime for every time a Windows box crashed... Oh wait a minute he already does.

Yeltsin Clinton and Bill Gates were invited to have dinner with God. During dinner he told them: I need three important people to send my message out to all the people: ""Tomorrow I will destroy the earth."" Yeltsin immediately called together his cabinet and told them: ""I have two really bad news items for you: 1) God really exists and 2) Tomorrow He will destroy the earth."" Clinton called an emergency meeting of the Senate and Congress and told them: ""I have good news and bad news: 1) The…

Bill Gates suddenly dies and finds himself face to face with God. God stood over Bill Gates and said ""Well Bill I'm really confused on this one. It's a tough decision; I'm not sure whether to send you to Heaven or Hell. After all you helped society enormously by putting a computer in almost every home in America yet you also created that ghastly Windows '95 among other indiscretions. I believe I'll do something I've never done before; I'll let you decide where you want to go."" Bill pushed up…

Q: How does Bill Gates screw in a lightbulb? A: He doesn't. He declares darkness the industry standard.

Bill Gates suddenly dies... ...and finds himself face to face with God. God stood over Bill Gates and said, "Well Bill, I'm really confused on this one. It's a tough decision; I'm not sure whether to send you to Heaven or Hell. After all, you helped society enormously by putting a computer in almost every home in America, yet you also created that ghastly Windows '95 among other indiscretions. I believe I'll do something I've never done before; I'll let you decide where you want to go." Bill p…

I thought Bill Gates would cave and release the new Microsoft Office early. But he kept his Word.

Bill Gates has now donated enough money to charity that he lost his billionaire status. He now goes by Mill Gates.

Bill Gates: "So today I farted in an apple store and everybody was pissed... hey, its not my fault they dont have windows!"

Bill Gates Goes Fishing Bill Gates goes fishing. Suddenly his fishing pole starts to jiggle, he quickly pulls it and see a gold fish hanging on it's edge. "WAIT! PLEASE DON'T EAT ME!" the fish screams. Bill answers: "oh wow, a talking fish! That's amazing! There you go little guy, I was going to release you anyway" and sets him free. The fish turns around and say: "Thank you, now how about a wish?" Bill answers: "Oh alright... what do you want?"

The Waiter and the Tip A Waiter greeting a young couple at a table, recognizes that the man he is serving is Bill Gate's son, Rory Gates! Excited at the prospect of a generous tip, the waiter tried his best to please Mr.Gates and his date. Sure enough, when the couple was done with their dinner, they had left a tip of $1000! More than 5x what their meal had cost them. The next day, while serving, the Waiter noticed that no one other than Bill Gates was sitting at the same table his son had sat…

Buisness Dad: I want you to marry a girl of my choice. Son: No! Dad: The girl is Bill Gates' daughter. Son: Then okay. Dad goes to Bill Gates... Dad: I want your daughter to marry my son. Bill Gates: No! Dad: My son is the CEO of World Bank. Bill Gates: Then okay. Dad goes to the President of the World Bank... Dad: Appoint my son as CEO. President: No! Dad: He is the son-in-law of Bill Gates. President: Then ok. This is BUSINESS

What is globalization? Question : What is globalization? Answer : Princess Diana's death Question : How come? Answer : An English princess with an Egyptian boyfriend crashes in a French tunnel, driving a German car with a Dutch engine, driven by a Belgian who was high on Scottish whiskey, followed closely by Italian Paparazzi, on Japanese motorcycles, treated by an American doctor, using Brazilian medicines! And this is sent to you by a Canadian, using Bill Gates' technology which he got f…

GM and Microsoft For all of us who feel only the deepest love and affection for the way computers have enhanced our lives, read on. At a computer expo, Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated "If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25.00 cars that got 1,000 miles to the gallon. In response to Bill's comments, General Motors issued a press release stating: If GM had developed technology like Micr…

I am Bill Gates and today, I will be teaching you how to count to ten: 1, 2, 3, 95, 98, NT, 2000, XP, Vista, 7, 8, 10.

How to do Business Dad: I want you to marry a girl of my choice. Son: No! Dad: The girl is Bill Gates' daughter. Son: Ok then. Dad goes to Bill Gates. Dad: I want your daughter to marry my son. Bill Gates: No! Dad: My son is the CEO of the World Bank. Bill Gates: Ok then. Dad goes to the president of the World Bank Dad: Make my son the CEO of your bank. President: No! Dad: He is the son in law of Bill Gates. President: Ok then.

Hi. My name is Bill Gates and today, I will be teaching you how to count to ten: 1, 2, 3, 95, 98, NT, 2000, XP, Vista, 7, 8, 10

How business works Dad: I want you to marry a girl of my choice. Son: No! Dad: The girl is Bill Gates' daughter. Son: Ok then. Dad goes to Bill Gates. Dad: I want your daughter to marry my son. Bill Gates: No! Dad: My son is the CEO of the World Bank. Bill Gates: Ok then. Dad goes to the president of the World Bank Dad: Make my son the CEO of your bank. President: No! Dad: He is the son in law of Bill Gates. President: Ok then.

Bill Gates recently visited a kindergarten and taught the children how to count to ten. ""1

Bill Gates and Donald Trump are alone in the Oval Office Trump remarks

Bill gates Donald Trump

Bill Gates dies and goes to hell. Satan greets him: ""Welcome Mr. Gates

Hi I'm Bill Gates! Today we're gonna learn how to count to 10. 1.01

Donald Trump Bill Gates

Bill Gates has a net worth of $86.9 billion To get an estimate of how big that is

Bill Gates dies in a car accident He finds himself in purgatory