#louie

whats that under your shirt, Louie? you wearing The Wire? you wearing a literal DVD taped to your chest for the purposes of a visual gag eh?

A man goes into a fancy restaurant When he gets to his table he sees that they have gold plate and says ""wow this restaurant has gold plates how fancy."" Then he sees that they also have gold silverware and says ""Wow they also have gold silverware how fancy."" After that he goes to the bathroom and sees they also have gold toilets and says ""Holy moly they have golden toilets that's super fancy."" So he finishes his meal and goes home but at home he remembers that he left his hat there. So he …

A guy walks into a bar, takes off his hat and places it onto the counter. A duck jumps out. The bartender asks, ""Can I help you, sir?"" The guy orders a shot. The bartender asks the guy if his duck friend wants anything, and the duck says, ""I'll have a Bloody Mary."" ""Oh! You're a talking duck!"" the bartender says. ""What's your name?"" ""Houie,"" the duck says. The bartender gets him a drink on the house then asks him how his day went. The duck says, ""It went great. I've been in and out of…

A man walks into a bar and starts talking to three ducks... He says to the first duck, ""Hey, little guy! How's your day been? The response comes ""Hi! I'm Hughie and I'm great! I've been in and out of puddles all day!"" The man talks to the second duck. ""And how are you doing?"" ""Hi! I'm Dewey and I'm doing fantastic! I've been in and out of puddles all day!"" The man turns to the third duck and says, ""Haha, so you must be Louie! How are-"" The third duck gloomly interrupts and says ""No, I'…

If The Jungle Book were written by George R.R. Martin... Bagheera would have died saving Mowgli from the snake, Kaa. Mowgli would have fallen while fetching honey for Baloo and become paralyzed. Kaa would have been beheaded by a bitter rival from House Anaconda. Raksha, sending her cubs to seek refuge in the jungle, dies at the hands (paws) of Shere Khan. Baloo would have valiantly defended Mowgli from Louie, earning the viewer's devout love, only to be later betrayed by the Wolf Pack, lying in …

Louie C.K.'s Honda Civic joke at the Oscars Really struck Accord

puddles so a duck walks into a bar and sits down the bartender asks him what his name is, the duck say ""huey"" ""so what have you been doing today huey?"" ""oh you know, this and that, splashing about, in and out of puddles all day"" the duck has a drink and leaves. A while later another duck walks into a bar and sits down the bartender asks him what his name is, the duck say ""dewey"" ""so what have you been doing today dewey?"" ""oh you know, this and that, splashing about, in and out of pudd…

What did scrooge mcduck use to educate huey , dewey and louie? Duck tapes

Little Johnny comes home from Sunday school with a black eye. His father sees it and says, ""Johnny, how many times do I have to tell you not to fight with the other boys?"" ""But Dad, it wasn't my fault. We were all in church saying our prayers. We all stood up and my teacher in front of me had her dress in the crack of her butt. I reached over and pulled it out. That's when she hit me!"" ""Johnny,"" the father said. ""You don't do those kind of things to women."" Sure enough, the very next sun…

Three little ducks go into a bar ""Say, what's your name?"" the bartender asked the first duck. ""Huey,"" was the reply. ""How's your day been, Huey?"" ""Great. Lovely day. Had a ball. Been in and out of puddles all day. What else could a duck want?"" said Huey. ""Oh. That's nice,"" said the bartender. He turned to the second duck, ""Hi, and what's your name?"" ""Dewey,"" came the answer from duck number two. ""So how's your day been, Dewey! ?"" he asked. ""Great. Lovely day. I've had a ball too…

Funny comeback from a student TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree, but also admitted it. Now, Louie, do you know why his father didn't punish him? LOUIS: Because George still had the axe in his hand.

Definition of ""faggot"" Gay guy: Well, 'fagot' used to really just mean a bundle of sticks. When they burned witches, they would also burn gay people. So, people now call gays, ""faggots."" Friend: ....So you're saying gays are an alternative fuel source? Louie

BREAKING. With Disney buying Star Wars Donald Duck will now have four nephews. Huey, Louie, Dewey and Chewie.

A minister concluded that his church was getting into serious financial troubles. While checking the church storeroom, he discovered several cartons of new bibles that had never been opened and distributed. So at his Sunday sermon, he asked for three volunteers from the congregation who would be willing to sell the bibles door-to-door for $10 each to raise the desperately needed money for the church. Peter, Paul and Louie all raised their hands to volunteer for the task. The minister knew that P…

This guy walks into a quiet bar. He is carrying three ducks, one in each hand and one under his left arm. He places them on the bar. He has a few drinks and chats with the Bartender. The Bartender is experienced and has learned not to ask people about the animals that they bring into the bar, so he doesn't mention the ducks. They chat for about 30 minutes before the guy with the ducks has to go to the restroom. The ducks are left on the bar. The bartender is alone with the ducks. There is an awk…

A minister concluded that his church was getting into serious financial troubles. Coincidentally, while checking the church storeroom, he discovered several cartons of new bibles that had never been opened and distributed. So at his Sunday sermon, he asked for three volunteers from the congregation who would be willing to sell the bibles door-to-door for $10 each to raise the desperately needed money for the church. Peter, Paul and Louie all raised their hands to volunteer for the task. The Reve…

Big Louie the Torpedo was becoming increasingly curious about one of the newer members of his mob Benny the Rod. Benny had been in the business for many years in another part of the country. During that time he had garnered quite a reputation for being the most conscientious and honorable hit man available. He was also considered quite eccentric perhaps odd in that for the last ten years or so he always kept one hand in his pocket - clutching his cold steel weapon in readiness (hence the nickna…

A guy walks into a bar with three ducks in a shopping bag. He sits down and proceeds to take each of the three ducks out of the bag and stand them on the bartop. Then he goes to the restroom. The bartender sees this, and knowing he should mind his own business, can't help but introduce himself. The gets down to eye level with the first duck and says, "Hello there, little duck. What's your name?" ^("The name's Huey.") "Pleased to meet you, Huey. How's your day?" ^("Pretty good. We went to t…

A collection of humorous anecdotes from the world of education >TEACHER: Maria, please can you find North America on the map. > >MARIA: Here it is. > >TEACHER: Correct. Now, class, who discovered America? > >CLASS: Maria. ​ >TEACHER: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor? > >JOHN: You told me to do it without using tables. ​ >TEACHER: Glen, how do you spell 'crocodile'? > >GLEN: K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L > >TEACHER: No, that's wrong. > >…

A guy walks into a bar holding three ducks. He sets them on the bar and orders a drink. After talking with the bartender for a while, the man excuses himself to use the restroom. The bartender feel a tad awkward with just himself and three ducks at the bar, so he decides to make small talk with them. He asks the first duck, "What's your name?" "Huey" replies the duck. "So, how's your day been?" "Oh, I've had a great day" replies Huey, "I've been in and out of puddles all day." The bartender asks…