#first-brother

Two brothers lived together with their grandmother and her cat. The first brother went on a business trip, and when he arrived at his destination, he checked into his hotel, and called his brother at home. ""I made it safe and sound"" he said. ""How is everything?"" ""Bad"" said the second brother. ""The cat is dead."" ""WHAT?!? How could you be so insensitive to tell me like that?"" The first brother exclaimed. ""You could have broken it to me slowly by saying the cat is on the roof, but you've…

3 Brothers immigrate to America and open a convenience store. Each of them can only speak 1 sentence of English. The eldest can only say ""Maybe, maybe not."" The second can say only ""One dollar-fifty."" The youngest, ""If you don't, somebody else will!"" A customer walks into the store, and takes a magazine from the display rack to the counter and asks ""is this for sale?"" The first brother replies ""maybe, maybe not."" Annoyed, he tries phrasing it differently; ""can I buy this or not?"" The…

Emigrating to America Two brothers have a lifelong dream to immigrate to America. They work hard and save their money. After many years, they have saved enough money and finally emigrate into New York. Before they begin building their new lives in America, they decide to see some of the famous places they dreamed of for so long; the Statue of Liberty, the Empire State Building, the Rockettes, and others. Eventually, they make their way to Coney Island. As they stroll down the beach, taking in al…

Two Irish brothers are applying for Work Visas to Australia. The first brother enters his interview, quickly walks out, gives a thumbs-up and says to his brother ""I'm in!"" The second brother takes this as a sure sign that he will join him, and walks confidently into his interview. ""So Mr... Patrick O'Malley"", the interviewer begins. ""What skills can you bring to Australia?"" Patrick explains: ""Well, I'm a turf cutter. The best there is! My father was a turf cutter. His father was a turf cu…

eer booze and fun!' 'There were these three brothers that were very close to each other. The brothers always went to a local bar on every Friday at 5:30 on the dot. When the brothers got married they all got married to their wifes to be on the same day and at the same place. When the brothers moved away from each other to go on with their lives with their new wife they all promised each other that they would still go to the bar every friday at 5:30 and drink for each other. On the first Friday…

Mom's birthday gifts 3 guys, who were brothers, were all discussing what gifts they were getting for their elderly mother for her birthday. The first brother, named Michael, said, "I bought mom her very own Lexus and chauffeur. She was always complaining about not being able to drive well." Jeremy, the second brother, said,"Well I bought mom a penthouse apartment. She always complains about the house she lives in." Lucas, the third brother, said, "Since mom always complains about not being …

3 idiot brothers are trying out for a job as a police detective... so the officer gives them a test. They are given a side profile head shot of a robber and they are asked how they will recognize him outside. The first brother says, 'This guy has only one eye', the officer sighs and says that it only looks that way since its a shot of his profile and fires him on the spot. The second brother says, 'This guy only has one ear', the officer sighs again and says it only looks that way since its a …

Two Newfie brothers are looking for a job... The first brother walks in and the recruiter asks "What do you do?" The Newfie replied "I'm a diesel fitter" and the recruiter says "Excellent, we can put you to work straight away in the oil fields." Excited, he goes and tells his brother he has a job. His brother walks in and the recruiter asks him the same question, to which the Newfie replied "I makes women's panties" and the recruiter said "excuse me?" Newfie says "yes by, I makes women's pantie…

Two brothers are discussing the details of their father's funeral The first one is trying to arrange everything himself, because he knows that the other one is pretty dim and sure to mess something up in some way. The dim brother insists that he won't. Finally the first brother relents and gives him a small task: "Just make sure dad looks nice for the service." The day of the service arrives and everything goes off without a hitch. The first brother congratulates the dim one on a job well do…

Two Brothers Move to the City There were two brothers who lived in the country. One day they decided they wanted to move to the big city and get jobs there. When they got there they went to the employment office to ask for jobs. The first brother went in for an interview and less than 10 minutes later he comes out of the office jumping for joy yelling "hoo wee! I got a job!" The second brother was so happy and excited for what he would get. He enters the office and the interviewer asks him …

Two Newfie brothers are looking for a job... The first brother walks in and the recruiter asks ""What do you do?"" The Newfie replied ""I'm a diesel fitter"" and the recruiter says ""Excellent

To solve a recruitment crisis, the chief of staff of the US Air Force decided to invite all the local young men and women along to an open day at an Arkansas airfield. As he and his staff were standing near a brand new jet fighter plane, two brothers walked over to them. The chief of staff held out his hand, introduced himself and, addressing the first brother, said: "Tell me, son, what skills can you bring to the Air Force?" The young man replied: "I pilot." "Great!" enthused the chief of staff…