#emergency-room

Just Spent 3 hours in the Emergency room...... .... the Dyson Ball vacuum has a VERY misleading name........

A doctor is examining a woman in the Emergency Room. The doctor takes the husband aside and says, ""I don't like the looks of your wife at all."" ""Me neither, Doc. But she's a great cook and she is really good with the kids.""

A man answers the phone - it's an Emergency Room doctor... He says ""Sir, your wife has been in a serious car accident. I have some good news, and some bad news. The bad news is she has lost the use of both arms and both legs, and will need help eating and going to the bathroom for the rest of her life."" ""Oh my god. What's the good news?"" says the man. The doctor replies ""I'm kidding. She's dead.""

Medical Humor 1...A man comes into the ER and yells . . .' My wife's going to have her baby in the cab.' I grabbed my stuff, rushed out to the cab, lifted the lady's dress and began to take off her underwear. Suddenly I noticed that there were several cabs - - - and I was in the wrong one. 2... At the beginning of my shift I placed a stethoscope on an elderly and slightly deaf female patient's anterior chest wall. 'Big breaths,'. . . I instructed. 'Yes, they used to be,'. . .replied the patient.…

A nurse was on duty in the Emergency Room when a young woman with purple punk rocker Mohawk hair, sporting a variety of tattoos and wearing strange clothing was admitted to the ER. It was quickly determined she had acute appendicitis and was scheduled for immediate surgery. When completely disrobed on the operating table, the staff noticed that her pubic hair had been dyed green and above it there was a tattoo that read . . ""Keep off the grass"". Once the surgery was completed, the surgeon wrot…

For my cake day, a joke... Harry answers the telephone, and it's an Emergency Room doctor. The doctor says, ""Your wife was in a serious car accident, and I have bad news and good news. The bad news is she has lost all use of both arms and both legs, and will need help eating and going to the bathroom for the rest of her life."" Harry says, ""My God. What's the good news?"" The doctor says, ""I'm kidding. She's dead.""

The Dr. who had examined my wife when she was rushed to the Emergency Room, pulled me aside and said, I don't like the looks of your wife at all.' I said Me neither doc,' ......'But she's a great cook and good with the kids.'

Harry answers the telephone, & it's an Emergency Room doctor. The doctor says, ""Your wife was in a serious car accident, & I have bad news and good news. The bad news is she has lost all use of both arms & both legs, & will need help eating & going to the bathroom for the rest of her life."" Harry says, ""My God. What's the good news?"" The doctor says, ""I'm kidding. She's dead.""

In celebration of my cake day, here's the worst joke I've ever created. There are two identical twin brothers that live together. One happens to be a well-respected dentist, and the other can't seem to keep a job. Instead of actively looking for work, he likes to sit around at home. One Saturday, the dentist is hungry, and puts his brother on the spot. He tells him to get off his lazy behind and go get them some food. After some protest, the lazy brother takes the car and leaves for the st…

8 years ago today, I shared the worst joke I ever created. I reposted it 4 years ago. Here it is again for those that missed it. There are two identical twin brothers that live together. One happens to be a well-respected dentist, and the other can't seem to keep a job. Instead of actively looking for work, he likes to sit around at home. One Saturday, the dentist is hungry, and puts his brother on the spot. He tells him to get off his lazy behind and go get them some food. After some protest, …

the dentist and his brother There are two identical twin brothers that live together. One happens to be a well-respected dentist, and the other can't seem to keep a job. Instead of actively looking for work, he likes to sit around at home. One Saturday, the dentist is hungry, and puts his brother on the spot. He tells him to get off his lazy behind and go get them some food. After some protest, the lazy brother takes the car and leaves for the store. In the meantime, the dentist takes a nap …