#dept

Awww. It looks like the neighbors are having the police dept over for brunch..

[inventing trees] Angel: what purpose do they serve? God: cats climb em Angel: can they climb back down? God [inventing the fire dept]: nope

U.S. DEPT OF FORESTRY: Sir, we believe you're hunting illegally GUY IN ALL CAMO W/ ORANGE HAT: *takes off hat* USDOF: Dammit we lost him

John's Interview When John went in for an interview at ABC company, he was hired after a very brief interview. A little skeptical at first, John asked the company representative a few questions. It went like this: ABC: Trust me, this company could really use someone new John: If there is too much work, I'm going to quit... ABC: We'd NEVER let something like that happen John: Do employees get every Saturday and Sunday off? ABC: That's a granted. John: Are employees required to work overtime witho…

I'm on holiday visiting the math dept. at Univ. of Manchester, England. I guess I'm an Alan Turist.

Do You Know With Whom Are You Talking A Trainee In An MNC Dialed The CEO By Mistake & Said: Hey, Send A Coffee To Accounts Dept. Do It Fast.. CEO: Do U Know With Whom R U Talking??? Trainee: No!!! CEO: I'm The CEO Of This Company... Trainee: Do U Know With Whom R U Talking??? Confused CEO Answers Slowly: No... Trainee: Thank God!!! (Disconnected The Phone & Said: All Is Well.. All Is Well.. All Is Well.)

My Magic Green Hat Earlier this year while on vacation to escape the snow and cold, I passed through Florida on my way to the Caribbean cruise. The day after returning from my cruise, I wasn't feeling very well and decided that I really needed some medical assistance... and decided to visit the emergency room at the closest medical facility. Realizing that it would likely be very crowded and not wanting to sit there waiting for 4-5 hours to be seen, I put on my MAGIC GREEN HAT. As soon as I ente…

The difference between before/after getting hired When Timmy went in for an interview at ABC company, he was hired after a very brief interview. A little skeptical at first, Timmy asked the company representative a few questions. It went like this: ABC: Trust me, this company could really use someone new Timmy: If there is too much work, I'm going to quit... ABC: We'd NEVER let something like that happen Timmy: Do employees get every Saturday and Sunday off? ABC: That's a granted. Timmy…

The difference between before/after getting hired When Timmy went in for an interview at ABC company, he was hired after a very brief interview. A little skeptical at first, Timmy asked the company representative a few questions. It went like this: ABC: Trust me, this company could really use someone new Timmy: If there is too much work, I'm going to quit... ABC: We'd NEVER let something like that happen Timmy: Do employees get every Saturday and Sunday off? ABC: That's a granted. Timmy:…

A guy applies for a job with his local police dept. Instructor - "These are the best qualifications I've ever seen, only one more test before you get the job. Take this gun, go out and shoot six black men and a rabbit." Guy - "Why the rabbit?" Instructor - "Fantastic attitude, you've got the job!"

It was a time of cost cutting & every Govt. Dept. had been told to scale back the overheads.

Sorry, but I just don't remember where I first heard this one... At our annual company picnic, the advertising department always played a game of softball with the editorial department. This year the ad dept won, 8-4. But on the company bulletin board the next morning was the following notice. The Editorial Dept. is proud to announce that upon the conclusion of this year's softball tournament, we finished in second place overall, having lost only one game the entire season. We would also like to…

Husband and wife are getting all snugly in bed. The passion is heating up. But then the wife stops and says, "I don' t feel like it. I just want you to hold me." The husband says " WHAT???" The wife explains that he must not be in tune with her emotional needs as a woman. The husband realizes that nothing is going to happen tonight and he might as well deal with it. So the next day the husband takes her shopping at a big dept. store. He walks around and had her try on three very expensive outfit…