#bruce-willis

Bruce Willis is never content with how hard he dies.

Bruce Willis angrily returns a cheese grater to the store, "IT DID NOT MAKE THE CHEESE GREATER! IT JUST MADE LOTS OF LITTLE CHEESE" he fumes

Bruce Willis: I hate when people talk during movies, I never do it Director: Yes but we're filming the movie now, do you see the difference

Bruce Willis in Starbucks. he gives his name as "not Bruce Willis" and when they call him he grabs his coffee and runs away giggling

Bruce Willis pours a can of Red Bull onto his flower bed then drinks 8 gallons of water out of a watering can before realising his mistake

Overheard a teenager watching Armageddon for the 1st time (after Bruce Willis blows up): "lol at least the hot one lived (Ben Affleck)."

Bruce Willis is relaxing by his pool. he's got so much sunscreen on that he slowly slides off his lounger, out of the gate & down the road

Bruce Willis is at the supermarket, standing by the cucumbers & laughing hysterically, pointing at them with tears streaming down his face

Bruce Willis is at IKEA when a toilet plunger falls off a shelf and sticks to his head. he doesn't notice until the following day

In the updated version of The Sixth Sense, Bruce Willis figures out he's dead when he sees his name trending on Twitter.

If Bruce Willis does any more Die Hard movies it will just be 90 minutes of him sitting in a rocking chair waiting to die from the flu.

Of course Bruce Willis is going to keep playing the same movie roles. You know what they say about old habits.....

[Bruce Willis on his deathbed] Bruce: Viagra! Dr: Bruce this isn't the time- Bruce: Give me...a Viagra! Dr: Ok *Bruce Dies...Hard*

Bruce Willis is being chased by a pug. he jumps in a taxi and escapes. he breathes a sigh of relief. the driver turns around. it's the pug

Bruce Willis is talking to a parrot. "I'm Bruce Willis" he says. The parrot repeats it. "yeah right" Bruce says, but is secretly worried

Bruce Willis on a jetski, being pursued by a pug on a smaller jetski

Why does Bruce Willis always play the bald guy?

Bruce Willis marks his height on his bedroom wall. He started doing it 2 years ago & it's just an increasingly thick line at the same height

Bruce Willis reaches for his iPhone but accidentally grabs his iPad and screams because he thinks he's shrunk

Bruce Willis found dead.... ....bored with acting

Sylvester Stallone, Bruce Willis, Arnold Schwarzenegger, and Steven Seagal decide to make and star in a movie about famous composers... Bruce: ""Okay guys, let's decide which musicians we'd like to portray"" Seagal: ""Well, I guess I'll play Beethoven if you guys think that works"" Stallone: ""that seems like a good fit. I think I'll be Mozart."" Willis: ""Sounds good so far. I'd like to portray Brahms."" *Stallone turns towards Schwarzenegger* ""Hey Arnold, have you decide who you want to play?…

""So did you hear Bruce Willis passed away?"" ""Really? How?"" ""Suicide. Overdosed on Viagra and Cialis."" ""That's terrible!"" ""Well, he always wanted to Die Hard.""

Bruce Willis, Chuck Norris and Arnold Schwarzenegger are all auditioning for a film about composers... Bruce Willis says ""I'll be Mozart"", Chuck Norris says ""I'll be Beethoven"" and Arnold Schwarzenegger says ""I'll be Bach"".

I once met Bruce Willis at a fancy dress party. He was wearing a really shabby looking nun outfit. I was told that he'd worn the same costume to every fancy dress party he'd attended for years. I suppose old habits die hard.

Bruce willis was found dead next to a bottle of viagra I guess you could say he died hard