#thor

I don't enjoy winning against The God of Thunder... He is always a Thor loser.

An Atheist Walks Into A Bar... An Atheist walks into a bar with God, Thor, and Zeus. The bartender looks at him and says ""Drinking alone again, I see...""

Who is Thor? A very worn-out thuper hero. (An excerpt from Brother Time and the Turtle: More Excuses for Jokes: http://amzn.com/B00BERRBI2)

So Thor hears about the other gods coming down to Earth for a good time ... and decides to try it out for himself. Meets a girl in bar and they get hot and heavy all night. At the end, he decides to tell her how he's honoured her: ""I am Thor!"" And the girl says: ""You're thor? I'm tho thor I can't pith.""

So, Thor is going to be female from now on. I bet Chris Hemsworth wishes he'd paid more attention to the small print when signing that Avengers contract

Marvel have announced Thor is set to become a woman. New super powers include being judgmental, temperamental and unreasonable.

Marvel announce the new Thor is female, to show that women are equal. Issue 1 sees Thor return the hammer back to her husband's toolbox.

The sound of thunder is no longer Thor's hammer. It's a pissed-off Lady-Thor stomping round Asgard and noisily filling the dishwasher while she waits for someone to ask her what's wrong...

Who is the only superhuman Frozone can't deal with? Thor.

A Skier's Dictionary Alp: One of a number of ski mountains in Europe. Also a shouted request for assistance made by a European skier on a U.S. mountain. An appropriate reply: ""What Zermatter?"" Avalanche: One of the few actual perils skiers face that needlessly frighten timid individuals away from the sport. See also: Blizzard, Fracture, Frostbite, Hypothermia, Lift Collapse. Bindings: Automatic mechanisms that protect skiers from potentially serious injury during a fall by releasing skis from …

Thor The god of thunder is riding through the sky on his mighty stallion. With lightning crashing all around, he triumphantly screams, "I'M THOR!" His horse looks up and says, "Of courthe you are, you forgot your thaddle thilly!"

Why was Thor unable to get any sleep? He Was Up All Night to Get Loki

I had this great joke about Thor... but thinking about it now, it's actually really low key.

After a particularly brutal battle with his fellow Avengers, Thor decides to relax at a local watering hole.... He drinks and drinks, barrels of beer and mead. After some time, he hits it off with a cute local girl and takes her back to Avengers Tower to show her his little Mjolnir. He wakes in the morning, satisfied, and looks at the girl sleeping next to him. The poor thing is battered, with a busted lip and bruises all over her face and body. He gently shakes her awake and asks, "Are you ok…

Thor Thor goes out for a ride on his mighty war horse. He rides all morning and afternoon until as the sun sets he is sat on the top of the highest mountain overlooking his entire domain. He stands up on the horse and shouts "I AM THOR" and as his voice echoes through the valleys his horse replies: "That's because you forgot your thaddle thilly"

Co-worker asked me, "If Batman, who is a regular human but with gadgets, teamed up with Superman, who has supernatural powers, and they fought against Iron Man, another regular human with gadgets, who teamed up with Thor, who has super powers, who would be the winners?" "Your parents when you move out."

Omar Epps moved next to Chris Hemsworth. Initially they didn't talk much, but after a little time they started having family get-togethers. They became good friends for a while, even going so far as to have little decoration challenges every holiday. Omar always pulled out all the stops come Christmas, and he seemed to enjoy it so much that, often, Chris would concede and just admire his neighbor's over-the-top yuletide spirit. But one year, Chris felt like upping the ante and properly compet…

What is the brand of underwear that Thor uses? Ass guard

Why didn't Thor invite many people to his brother's surprise party? He wanted to keep it Loki

Is your butt Thor? ....cuz I'll be your Asguardian.

Thor: Brother! What are you doing this weekend? Loki: nothing

How does Thor blend in to society without being noticed? He keeps it Loki.

Thor gets drunk blacks out and wakes up next to a man.

Thor Thor is riding on the back of his mighty war horse. He shouts ""I AM THOR! I AM THOR!"" His horse replies: ""That's because you forgot your thaddle thilly!""

Why did Thor file a police report? Because someone stole his thunder