#moss

Did you hear about a Russian-speaking Indian? He worships a moss cow

Mick Jagger was awarded for his lifetime achievement in music industry for over 55 years. He didn't have a date to the ceremony so Kate Moss, who was a huge fan of Mick, volunteered to be with him for the night. It was decided that he'll pick her up from her hotel. On the evening of the ceremony Mick didn't pick her up and went straight to the ceremony alone. Apparently a rolling stone gathers no moss.

What did the naturalist say when he saw a number of rocks covered in moss? ""I'm lichen what I see""

A Short History of Military Budget Cutbacks. In 2005, due to budget cutbacks the US army decided to start combining military occupational specialties within the computer science field into new MOSs. Soldiers that joined the army to write software now had to also know hardware. Soldiers that wanted to install cabling now also had to install fiber optic networking. Officers had to learn their new responsibilities just as their soldiers did in order to maintain a good work force. In 2008, more budg…

What do you call a cow in a Russian forest? A moss-cow. Alternative answer: dead.

What did the hiker say when he fell in a pile of moss? ""I'm not lichen this!'

I wrote this joke...no really,I did. Hope you like it! Once upon a NO time,there was a NO village. The NO village was NO home to many NO villagers. In the NO village,there were NO two NO rules:NO one,every NO noun had to be preceded by the NO word NO(in all NO caps) unless it was a proper NO noun,or unless it already had the NO word 'no' in front it as part of the sentence. NO two,there was no friction in the NO village,so the NO objects would always slide NO everywhere. Now,NO one NO day,a NO o…

I asked Mick Jagger to pick me up some swampy plants. But a Rolling Stone gathers no moss.

Three hikers are in the woods... ...and they come across a rock with some strange life form growing on it. The first hiker exclaims: ""Wow, look at this amazing fungus!"" The second hiker replies: ""Nah, that looks more like moss to me."" Says the third: ""Well, I know what I'd lichen it to.""

How do the Rolling Stones like their burgers? Plain - Rolling Stones gather no moss-tard!

In the middle of a beautiful forest there is a pond filled with clear, cool water. Flying about six inches above the pond is a fly. The fly is thinking "I'm thirsty. If I drop down to the surface of the pond I can get a drink". Unknown to the fly a fish is quietly watching it and thinking "That fly looks thirsty. If it drops down to get a drink I can swim up and eat it. That would be a nice snack". At the edge of the pond there is a bear, it was watching the fish and the fly. It thinks to its…

Okay, I thought this up on the way to work this morning and I'm like 40% sure it's original. What did one patch of moss say to the other when asked what he thought of the summer weather? He said: "I'm lichen it so far!" Now you're allowed to laugh, if you'd like.

Moss and Algae take a liking to each other. Algae and a Moss took a liking to each other and soon after got married. After a few years they realized their marriage was on the rocks.

What Super Models should you invite to your birthday party ? What Super Models should you invite to your birthday party ? Cake Moss and Naomi Candles

How do rocks feel about moss? It's growing on them.

What Super Models should you invite to your birthday party ? Cake Moss and Naomi Candles

What do you call a Russian bovine covered in lichen? A Moss-cow

What do you call a Russian bovine made out of small flowerless plants? A moss-cow

Why didn't Mick Jagger pick Randy Moss up from the airport? Because a Rolling Stone gathers no Moss.

Your Mama's So Ugly you're dad first met her at the pound! 3962. Your Mama's So Ugly when she was born, the doctor slapped her and her parents! 3963. Your Mama's So Ugly she tied a pork chop around her neck and the dog still wouldn't play with her! 3964. Your Mama's So Ugly if she were a scarecrow, the corn would run away! 3965. Your Mama's So Ugly it looks like she ran the 100 yard dash in a 90 yard gym! 3966. Your Mama's So Ugly they pay her to put her clothes on in strip joints! 3967. Your Ma…