#mia

Baby Soldier: Ma'am. Your husband is MIA. Soldiers wife: *covers crying face with hands* Baby Soldier: Oh great! Now his wife is MIA too.

[Scene: Cloud City. Two men fight each other with lightsabers] Mario: You-a kill my father! Wario: No. I am-a your father. Mario: Mama-mia!

It's 1968. China and the Soviet Union are on the verge of open hostilities. And only the pope can intervene... Well, so thinks the president of the UN. See, he'd been up all night watching *The Shoes of the Fisherman*, and it was such a harrowing vision that he was determined that the pope, and only the pope, could broker a deal between two hostile nations. If you've not seen *The Shoes of the Fisherman*, it's a fine film with Anthony Quinn and there's international problems solved by the pope. …

In honor of the papal visit, I submit the worst, longest, most tortuous pope joke I know. It's 1969. China and the Soviet Union are on the brink of open hostilities. The war would kill us all. And only the pope can save the day. Well, so thinks Richard Nixon. See, he'd been up all night watching *The Shoes of the Fisherman*, and it was such a harrowing vision that he was determined that the pope, and only the pope, could broker a deal between two hostile nations. If you've not seen *The Shoes of…

What's a specimen? Mama mia, it's an Italian astronaut!

A German, an Italian and a Newfie are sitting on a steel girder... ...hundreds of feet above the ground, having lunch. The German opens up his lunch box and lets out a groan. "Mein Gott!" he says. "Not wiener schnitzel again! I'm so sick of wiener schnitzel, if I ever have to eat wiener schnitzel for lunch again I'm going to throw myself from this girder." Then the Italian opens up his lunch box and lets out a cry of disgust. "Mamma mia! Rigatoni con pollo e funghi! Again! I am so sick of riga…

Mamma Mia! Gina had just gotten married and being a traditional Italian, she was still a virgin. So, on her wedding night, staying at her mother's house, she was nervous. But her mother reassured her. "Don't worry, Gina. Tony's a good man. Go upstairs and he'll take care of you." So up she went. When she got upstairs, Tony took off his shirt and exposed his hairy chest. Gina ran downstairs to her mother and says, "Mama, Mama, Tony's got a big hairy chest." "Don't worry, Gina," say…

An Italian, a Frenchman and a Chinese man are hired to dig a tunnel The foreman assigns the tasks before they begin to work. "Alright Gino here will dig the tunnel, Henri will reinforce it with wood and Wang will be in charge of the supplies." And so the Italian, the Frenchman and the Chinese man set off to work. The following afternoon, the foreman comes by to check on the tunnel's progress, and sees that nothing's been done. Furious, he approaches the Italian man: "Gino, why haven't you …

What do Italians say when their mother gets lost during a war? Mama MIA.

Finally Together Mia

Did you guys know that the entire Miami Dolphins team is missing?,"Yeah I saw it on ESPN. It had their team logo and then a big MIA next to it.

Why do you never see any ancient Central American civilizations anymore? They're all M.I.A.

Did you guys know that the entire Miami Dolphins team is missing? Yeah, I saw it on ESPN. It had their team logo and then a big MIA next to it.