#esther

Plane Ride Morris and his wife Esther went to the state fair every year, and every year Morris would say, ""Esther, I'd like to ride in that airplane."" Esther always replied, ""I know, Morris, but that airplane ride costs fifty dollars, and fifty dollars is fifty dollars."" One year Morris and Esther went to the fair, and Morris said, ""Esther, I'm eighty-five years old. If I don't ride that airplane, I might never get another chance."" Esther replied, ""Morris, that airplane ride costs fifty d…

A talmudist goes to Moscow... After months of negotiation with the authorities, a Talmudist from Odessa was finally granted permission to visit Moscow. He boarded the train and found an empty seat. At the next stop, a young man got on and sat next to him. The scholar looked at the young man and he thought: This fellow doesn't look like a peasant, so if he is no peasant he probably comes from this district. If he comes from this district, then he must be Jewish because this is, after all, a Jewis…

""Fifty dollars is Fifty dollars!"" Morris and his wife Esther went to the state fair every year, and every year Morris would say, 'Esther, I'd really like to ride in that helicopter.' Esther always replied, 'I know Morris, but that helicopter ride is fifty dollars, and fifty dollars is fifty dollars' One year Esther and Morris went to the fair, and Morris said, 'Esther, I'm 85 years old. If I don't ride that helicopter, I might never get another chance.' To this, Esther replied, 'Morris that he…

Abe and Esther are flying to Australia for a two week vacation to celebrate their 40th anniversary. Suddenly, over the public address system, the Captain announces, ""Ladies and Gentlemen, I am afraid I have some very bad news. Our engines have ceased functioning and we will attempt an emergency landing. Luckily, I see an uncharted island below us and we should be able to land on the beach. However, the odds are that we may never be rescued and will have to live on the island for the rest of our…

A Jewish couple are sitting together on an airplane flying to the Far East. Over the public address system the Captain announces: ""Ladies and Gentlemen I am afraid I have some very bad news. Our engines have ceased functioning and this plane will be going down momentarily. Luckily I see an island below us that should be able to accommodate our landing. This island appears to be uncharted; I am unable to find it on our maps. So the odds are that we will never be rescued and will have to live on …

The Most Famous Man Who Ever Lived One day at primary school, the teacher said to the class of 5-year-olds, "I'll give 50 cents to the child who can tell me who was the most famous man who ever lived." An Irish lad put his hand up and said, "It's Bono!" The teacher said, "Sorry, Sean, that's not correct." Then a Scottish boy put up his hand and said, "It's Sean Connery!" The teacher replied, "I'm sorry, Harry, that's not right either." Finally, a little Jewish girl raised her hand and said…

What do you call an old lady in an open relationship? A poly Esther.

Stranded on an island Abe and Esther are flying to Australia for a two-week vacation to celebrate their 40th anniversary. ​ Suddenly, over the public address system, the Captain announces, ​ “Ladies and Gentlemen, I am afraid I have some very bad news. Our engines have ceased functioning and we will attempt an emergency landing. “ ​ “Luckily, I see an uncharted island below us and we should be able to land on the beach. However, the odds are that we may never be rescu…

Abe and Esther are flying to Australia for a two week vacation to celebrate their 40th anniversary. Suddenly

A man and his wife went to the state fair every year Morris and his wife Esther went to the state fair every year