#doctor-who

"Laughter is the best medicine" -doctor who failed med school

ME: You go thru space & time, just traveling alone? DOCTOR WHO: Usually w/a companion ME: Folks from space-time? DW: God no 21st century UK

Doctor Who. He can travel to any planet during any period but mostly ends up in places that look like present day England.

There's a doctor here to see you. Doctor who? No, I think it's a non time traveling one.

Coming soon to NBC: She's a lawyer who, you guessed it, doesn't play by the rules. And he's a doctor who, right again, pees sitting down.

Who are you going to trust, some real doctor who says it's impossible to make you a centaur, or me, the guy with a hacksaw and half a horse?

A man visits the doctor... ...who says to him ""*Okay, Sir, I think you're going to have to stop masterbating""* *""But why, Doc?*"" the man replies. ""*Because this is the waiting room*"".

Quick Diagnoses A young doctor had moved out to a small community to replace a doctor who was retiring. The older doctor suggested that the young doctor accompany him on his rounds, so that the community could become used to the new one. At the first house a woman complained, ""I've been a little sick to my stomach."" The older doctor dropped his stethoscope on the ground, and when he stood up, he said, ""Well, you've probably been overdoing it on the fresh fruit. Why not cut back on the amount …

Two hikers are walking through the woods... when one gets bitten in the nuts by a snake. The other hiker says ""Stay here, I'll run back to town and find help."" The hiker finds a doctor who is busy delivering a baby, but tells the hiker he can simply suck the venom out of the wound. He runs back, and his friend asks him what happened. He says,""The good news is I found a doctor, the bad news is you're going to die.""

There was once a doctor who tried to prove that mainly blood was kept in bones, But alas it twas in vein.

What do you call a cancer doctor who works 24/7? An on-call-ogist

What do they call the doctor who released private health information after he got mad at his being given away? A Hipaacrite

Doctor Who was still hungry after dinner.... So he went back four seconds.

Did you hear about the doctor who fell into a well? He should have been attending to the sick and left the well alone.

My compilation of ""Knock, knock"" jokes. *Knock, knock.* Who's there? *Knock, knock.* Knock, knock who? *I am knocking.* ------- *Knock, knock.* Who's there? *Doctor.* Doctor who? *Correct.* -------- *Knock, knock.* Who's there? *Woo.* Woo who? *It's just me, no need to get so excited.* -------- *Knock, knock.* Who's there? *Horton hears a.* Horton hears a who? *Correct.* -------- *Knock, knock.* Who's there? *Hoo.* Hoo who? *Lol are you an owl?* ---------- Submit your ""Knock, knock"" jokes be…

What do you call a doctor who is always on a phone? An oncologist

Karma Tyrone was having trouble in school; his teacher was always yelling at him, ""You're driving me crazy, Tyrone; can't you learn anything? One day Tyrone's mother came to school to see how he was doing. The teacher told her honestly that her son was simply a disaster, getting very low marks, and that she had never had such an unmotivated and ignorant boy in her entire teaching career. Tyrone's mom, shocked at the feedback, withdrew her son from school and moved out of Detroit, relocating to …

Once upon a time...... .....a little boy named John lived a village with his mother. His father already died in an accident and his mother has to work very hard to run the family. John was hated by his classmates at school for stupidity in class. Even the class teacher said to him, ""You are driving me crazy John!"" One day her mother went to his school to check on his progress and was speaking to the teacher. The teacher was being very honest and told her the truth about her son and how disaste…

The once was a doctor who owned a inn.... There once was a doctor who lived in a small town and owned a inn called the Spanish Inn. Everyone in town knew and trusted the doctor and he was admired. One day his inn burned down and the authorities believed it was his wiring and he was tried for arson. During the trial his wife breaks down and says the doctor burned the inn himself for the insurance money since the inn was old and crumbling. It was then and there that the town realized no one suspec…

Do you know why the Cybermen are the best Doctor Who characters? [deleted]

Did you hear about the Doctor who fell down the well? He was taking a break at work and leaned too far over a well and fell right in! Guess he should have tended to the sick and left the well alone.

Have you heard about the new female doctor who can cure illness with all natural, homeopathic remedies? Look her up! She just goes by the name, ""Miss Information"" Edit: source - South Park

Knock-Knock... -Who's there? -Doctor. -Doctor Who? -No, bitch. Doctor House.

What do you call a gay doctor who went to college in France, married an Irishwoman and practiced medicine in Italy? A Fag

woman goes to the doctor with smotach pains and no one can solve the problem until... Doctors could see that the problem was a roundworm inside her but have prescrisbed every kind of medication and it was still alive. Finally she gets directed by a friend to a doctor who says have a method to kill any roundworm. She goes there and the doctor makes all the exams. With all the exames at hand, they start talking: Doctor: Yes, I know that kind, its a tough son of a b*tch, I dealt with it before and …