#southwest-airlines

Kevin Smith's new movie looks awful. I think I'd rather watch a movie directed by Southwest Airlines.

From a Southwest Airlines employee ""Welcome aboard Southwest Flight XXX to Chicago. To operate your seatbelt, insert the metal tab into the buckle, and pull tight. It works just like every other seatbelt and if you don't know how to operate one, you probably shouldn't be out in public unsupervised. In the event of a sudden loss of cabin pressure, oxygen masks will descend from the ceiling. Stop screaming, grab the mask, and pull it over your face. If you have a small child traveling with you, s…

A boy is on a plane and asks his parents, If a mummy cat and daddy cat make a kitten, a mummy dog and a daddy dog make puppies, and mummy and daddy make a baby, how do planes make babies?"", the mother says ""I don't know darling, ask the captain"". So the boy asks the captain his question. The captain asks the boy whether his parents told him to ask, and he said yes. The captain says, ""Well, planes don't make babies because, other airlines load the rear first, and we are Southwest airlines and…

Mother & Daughter Are on a Plane... Mother & daughter are on a plane. Daughter asks mother, ""Mommy, if big dogs have baby dogs & big cats have baby cats, why don't big planes have baby planes?"" The mother stumbled and didn't have an answer for that one so she desperately looks around and replies, ""I don't know sweetie, why don't you go ask that nice flight attendant, I'm sure she'll have an answer."" So the little girl goes up the the flight attendant and asks, ""If big dogs have …

Pull out in time. A mother and her son were flying Southwest Airlines from Oakland to Kansas City. The son, who had been looking out the window, turned to his mother and said: ""If big dogs have baby dogs and big cats have baby cats, why don't big planes have baby planes? The mother, who couldn't think of an answer, told her son to ask the flight attendant. So, the little boy asked the flight attendant: ""If big dogs have baby dogs and big cats have baby cats, why don't big planes have baby plan…

Looks like Southwest Airlines needs to install a GPS Tomtom in the planes so their pilots don't get lost.

A mother and her young son were flying Southwest Airlines from Kansas City to Chicago. The son turned from the window to his mother and asked, ""If big dogs have baby dogs and big cats have baby cats, why don't big planes have baby planes?"" The mother said, ""Well, maybe that's something you could ask the stewardess."" So the boy asked the stewardess, ""If big dogs have baby dogs and big cats have baby cats, why don't big planes have baby planes?"" The stewardess responded, ""Did your mother te…

From a Southwest Airlines employee.... ""Welcome aboard Southwest Flight XXX to YYY. To operate your seatbelt insert the metal tab into the buckle and pull tight. It works just like every other seatbelt and if you don't know how to operate one you probably shouldn't be out in public unsupervised. In the event of a sudden loss of cabin pressure oxygen masks will descend from the ceiling. Stop screaming grab the mask and pull it over your face. If you have a small child traveling with you secure y…

A mother and her son were flying ""Southwest Airlines"" from Kansas to Chicago. The son (who had been looking out the window) turned to his mother and said ""If big dogs have baby dogs and big cats have baby cats why don't big planes have baby planes?"" The mother (who couldn't think of an answer) told her son to ask the stewardess. So the boy asked the stewardess ""If big dogs have baby dogs and big cats have baby cats why don't big planes have baby planes?"" The stewardess asked ""Did your mot…

From a Southwest Airlines employee: ""There may be 50 ways to leave your lover but there are only 4 ways out of this aircraft...""

Southwest A mother and her very young son were flying Southwest Airlines from Kansas City to Chicago. The little boy (who had been looking out the window) turned to his mother and asked, "If big dogs have baby dogs, and big cats have baby cats, why don't big airplanes have baby airplanes?" The mother (who couldn't think of an answer) told her son to ask the stewardess. So the boy went down the aisle and asked the stewardess. The stewardess, who was very busy at the time, smiled and said, "D…

Mother & Daughter Are on a Plane... Mother & daughter are on a plane. Daughter asks mother, "Mommy, if big dogs have baby dogs & big cats have baby cats, why don't big planes have baby planes?" The mother stumbled and didn't have an answer for that one so she desperately looks around and replies, "I don't know sweetie, why don't you go ask that nice flight attendant, I'm sure she'll have an answer." So the little girl goes up the the flight attendant and asks, "If big dogs have baby dogs & b…

Southwest Airlines A mother and her son were flying Southwest Airlines from Oakland to Kansas City.

Flying Southwest Airlines A mother and her young son were flying Southwest Airlines from Kansas City to Chicago . The little boy