#kellys

How did R. Kelly's girlfriend feel when she found out he's into watersports? She was pissed.

A good joke for a date Joe takes Kelly to a carnival on a blind date. Joe asks, ""what would you like to do first?"" and Kelly replies, ""I want to get weighed."" So they visit the weight guesser who predicts that Kelly weighs 130 pounds. Since she only weighs 110 pounds, Kelly wins a stuffed animal. Joe asks what she would like to do next, to which she replies again, ""I want to get weighed."" He suggests the Ferris wheel, but Kelly is adamant. So they return to the weight guesser, and, of cour…

In my hometown... In my hometown there was a large brick building with a big sign painted on the side of it: ""Kelly's Tool Works"". One morning everyone woke up to see that someone had painted below it ""So does mine!""

An Irish joke from Murphy (Best read drunk) Kelly showed up at Mass one Sunday and the priest almost fell over with joy. Kelly hadn’t been to church in years. Enthused with Kelly’s presence, Father delivered an impassioned sermon on the Ten Commandments. After Mass, skirts flying, Father caught up with Kelly at the church door. “Kelly, I am so glad ya decided to come to Mass, what brought ya?” Kelly said, “To be honest Father, a while back, I lost me hat and I really, really love that hat.…

What is R. Kelly's favorite group to feature? Black Guy Pees.

What's R. Kelly's favorite movie about singing? Piss Perfect.