#jewish-guy

An Englishman, a German, a Frenchman, and a Jewish guy are lost in the desert. The Englishman says ""I'm so thirsty, I must have some tea!"" The German says ""I'm so thirsty, I must have ze beer!"" The Frenchman says ""I'm so thirsty, I must 'ave some wine!"" The Jewish guy says ""I'm so thirsty, I must have diabetes!""

A Jewish man and a Czechoslovakian man... ...were walking in a national forest. All of a sudden, a bear appeared and ate the Czechoslovakian man. The Jewish guy ran back to find someone to help. He found a Forest Ranger and told him what had happened. So the ranger took a gun and went back into the forest. There were two bears together. "Now there are only two bears on this mountain," the ranger explained. "One is a male, the other is a female. Which is the one that ate your friend?" The Jewish…

A Jewish guy and a Chinese guy are sitting on a bus The Jewish guy turns to the Chinese guy and says "man I really hate Chinese people." The Chinese guy goes "why?" And the Jewish guy goes "because you guys bombed Pearl Harbor!" The Chinese guy says "that wasn't us that was the Japanese!" The Jewish guy replies "Japanese, Chinese, Vietnamese you're all the same!" So the Chinese guy thinks about this and then says "well you know what? I really hate Jewish people!" And the Jewish guy goes "why?"…

A Frenchman, an Italian and a Jewish man die and go to heaven.... An angel ushers the Frenchman into a room filled with every French delicacy imaginable and instructs him - you can eat whatever you want, but if you eat anything from this table, at 5:00 a boiling pot of French onion soup will be wheeled in and you're going in it. The Frenchman thinks for a moment and stands back in fear. An angel ushers the Italian into a room filled with every Italian delicacy imaginable and instructs him -…