#blaze

There's a fire at a trick birthday candle plant. Firefighters have been battling the blaze on and off for 5 days.

FIREMAN: this blaze is out of control ME: sometimes you gotta fight fire with fire F: what? No M: *already brandishing a flamethrower*

right before i die, i want to stuff myself with 100 chicken nuggets and blaze tf up

Fireman: Is anyone else inside the house? Me: Uh yes..my son is trapped in my room he- [fireman charges into blaze] ..HE LOOKS LIKE AN XBOX

The oil fire. Several decades ago, there was an oil tycoon. He discovered one morning, that one of his largest oil wells had burst and caught fire costing him large amounts of money by the minute. He quickly called all the large fire departments for miles around, offering thirty thousand dollars to the department that could extinguish the blaze. Many departments and trucks from miles around tried but failed, all stopping 200 yards away from the inferno. A small, four man department from a not ve…

Warehouse fire (long) There was a warehouse that caught fire. It started as a single alarm fire but quickly grew to a 3 alarm blaze. The owner of the warehouse arrived on scene and quickly realized that the fire department wasn't going to be able to save the building. His biggest concern was the secret formula stored in his office. He approached the chief and said ""Sir, I don't care about the building but you have to save my secret formula! If you do, I will give you $500,000."" The chief thoug…

An apartment building in Harlem burns down to the ground A black family of eight lived on the first floor. There were no survivors. A Mexican family of ten lived on the second floor. Nobody survived the blaze. A Muslim family of twelve lived on the third floor. Everybody perished there as well. A white family of four lived on the fourth floor. Nobody was injured. A news crew covering the story interviews the fire marshal. They ask him how could that be. ""Simple"" the fire marshal says. ""Everyb…

Agricultural Addiction There was a young boy in rural Ireland who became absolutely obsessed with tractors. Everything was about tractors. He collected toy ones, he'd go out to the fields to watch them work, and he wanted to be a tractor driver when he grew up. Eventually the obsession became too much and he began to miss school, so his parents put him into therapy to cure his addiction. He completed his therapy and was back to normal. Many years later when the man was married with a family, a f…

One dark night outside a small town, a fire started inside the local chemical plant and before you could snap your fingers it exploded into flames and the alarm went out to the volunteer fire departments from miles around. When the volunteer firefighters appeared on the scene, the chemical company president rushed to the fire chief and said, ""All of our secret formulas are in the vault in the center of the plant. They must be saved. I will give $50,000 to the engine company that brings them out…

A photographer from a well know national magazine was assigned to cover the fires at Yellowstone National Park. The magazine wanted to show some of the heroic work of the fire fighters as they battled the blaze. When the photographer arrived, he realized that the smoke was so thick that it would seriously impede or make it impossible for him to photograph anything from ground level. He requested permission to rent a plane and take photos from the air. His request was approved and arrangements we…

Fire investigators on Maui have determined the cause of a blaze that destroyed a $127000 home last month - a short in the homeowner's newly installed fire prevention alarm system. ""This is even worse than last year"" said the distraught homeowner ""when someone broke in and stole my new security system...""

There was a huge fire at a big city soda factory. The city company was losing ground and the owner was frantic. He told the fire department that he needed a secret formula in the safe that was in the center of the blaze and he would give 10000 dollars to the department that got the formula. An hour later no ground was gained and a mutual aid call was put out. When 12 departments couldn't subdue the blaze the owner saw this he raised the reward to 100000 dollars. Suddenly a small town department…

When the employees of a restaurant attended a fire safety seminar they watched a fire official demonstrate the proper way to operate an extinguisher. ""Pull the pin like a hand grenade"" he explained ""then depress the trigger to release the foam."" Later an employee was selected to extinguish a controlled fire in the parking lot. In her nervousness she forgot to pull the pin. The instructor hinted ""Like a hand grenade remember?"" In a burst of confidence she pulled the pin -- and hurled th…

The Englishman's Irishman's and Scotsman's wives go shopping one day to a big department store. While they are there a fire breaks out. Everyone in the store is killed including the three women. Their husbands are summoned to the local police station where a policewoman breaks the news to them: ""I'm afraid sirs that we believe your wives were killed in the fire at the department store. However the fire was so intense we cannot identify the bodies. Only their handbags survived the blaze. Can y…

One dark night outside a small town, a fire started inside the local chemical plant One dark night outside a small town, a fire started inside the local chemical plant and before you could snap your fingers it exploded into flames and the alarm went out to the volunteer fire departments from miles around. When the volunteer firefighters appeared on the scene, the chemical company president rushed to the fire chief and said, "All of our secret formulas are in the vault in the center of the plan…

A Fire Started In A Chemical Plant One dark night outside a small town, a fire started inside the local chemical plant and before you could snap your fingers it exploded into flames and the alarm went out to the volunteer fire departments from miles around. When the volunteer firefighters appeared on the scene, the chemical company president rushed to the fire chief and said, "All of our secret formulas are in the vault in the center of the plant. They must be saved. I will give $50,000 to th…

Pilot A photographer from a well know national magazine was assigned to cover the fires at Yellowstone National Park. The magazine wanted to show some of the heroic work of the fire fighters as they battled the blaze. When the photographer arrived, he realized that the smoke was so thick that it would seriously impede or make it impossible for him to photograph anything from ground level. He requested permission to rent a plane and take photos from the air. His request was approved and arrang…

Warehouse fire (long) There was a warehouse that caught fire. It started as a single alarm fire but quickly grew to a 3 alarm blaze. The owner of the warehouse arrived on scene and quickly realized that the fire department wasn't going to be able to save the building. His biggest concern was the secret formula stored in his office.

One day at university, a fire broke out in a wastebasket in the dean's office. A physicist, a chemist and an actuary ran in to deal with the blaze. The physicist immediately started to calculate how much energy would have to be removed from the fire in order to stop combustion. The chemist worked out which reagent would have to be added to the fire to prevent oxidation. Meanwhile, the actuary was setting fire to all the other wastebaskets in the office. "What the hell are you doing that for?" as…