People of USA are fed up of the current Presidential candidates and decided to hold a mass boycott As Americans hated all the candidates so much, that no one voted. The government is in a panic, trying to figure out what to do to decide who the next president will be. Finally, Barack Obama comes up with an idea: A literal presidential race. The three candidates would run a lap around the white house, and the best time would become president. Bernie Sanders goes first, but being as old as he is, …

It's the end of the 2016 Presidential Race.... and the people of the US hated all the candidates so much that nobody voted. The government is in a panic trying to figure out what to do to decide who the next president will be. Finally, Barack Obama comes up with an idea: a literal presidential race. The three candidates would run a lap around the White House and the person with the best time would become president. Bernie Sanders goes first, but being as old as he is, he takes about 24 minutes. …

Tiger Woods, Michael Jordan, and Barack Obama walk into a liquor store. Tiger Woods brings his alcohol up to the counter, and the clerk asks him for ID. Tiger tells the clerk he doesn't have any, but can't she tell he's Tiger Woods? The clerk says sure but I have to have some definite proof. So Tiger goes out to his car, grabs a pitching wedge, and brings it into this store. Tiger precedes to hit a ball 20 feet into a cup without even knocking it over. Clerk says 'Alright take your alcohol.' Mic…

Barack Obama walks into a Halloween Party with the First Lady on his shoulders... ...the doorman says, ""Excuse me Mr. President, but this is a Halloween party. Why aren't you dressed up?"" Obama says, ""I am dressed up! I'm a snail. I got Michelle on my back.""