50 Great Jokes From The Edinburgh Fringe

*The Glasgow Brothel* The madam opened the brothel door in Glasgow and saw a rather dignified, well-dressed, good-looking man in his late forties. ""May I help you sir?"" she asked. ""I want to see Valerie,"" the man replied. ""Sir, Valerie is one of our most expensive ladies. Perhaps you would prefer someone else"", said the madam. ""No, I must see Valerie,"" he replied. Just then, Valerie appeared and announced to the man she charged 5000 a visit. Without hesitation, the man pulled out five th…

True Scottish Tales I was drinking in a bar in Edinburgh with my new Scottish friend. We were getting all liquored up, having a good time, just chit chatting, one passing tourist and a local. Late in the evening, the Scotsman gets all serious with me, puts his hand on my shoulder and says..""Can I ask you a personal question?"" I said to my new buddy, ""sure, fire away"". And he says.....""If you woke up in the middle of the woods, not knowing where the hell you were and what you were doing ther…

My grandad has the heart of a lion... ...and a lifetime ban from the Edinburgh zoo