Topical Jokes for 1/6 A report shows that North Korea has 6,000 cyber attack specialists. In fairness, North Korea's definition of ""cyber attack specialist"" is anyone who's ever watched ""The Matrix."" ...these cyber attack specialists can access any computer on the planet, and leave the message ""Please. Help me get out of North Korea."" In Mexico, a vicious drug cartel forced some members to eat human hearts. Ex-members of the cartel who were forced to eat hearts have formed a class action, and are suing the cartel for 100 million kilos of cocaine. In Florida, a man brought a five-month-old baby to an attempted burglary. The man has been offered a reduced sentence, if he agrees to testify against the baby.