Trying to buy things in Soviet Russia. (not my own creation, just ran into them and I think they should be told a lot) There was this old grandfather in Moscow who was a little confused. His neighbors knew that, so when they saw him standing outside his door with an empty shopping bag, they tried to help: ""Grandpa, what are you doing?"" ""Ah, sorry, I forgot. Do you know if I'm going out shopping or have I already returned?"" They could tell him that he wasn't away yet, so he went to see if the…