#wellington

Mother Theresa looks down into hell from heaven... She sees them getting ready for dinner. It's a feast, beef Wellington, shrimp, twice baked potatoes, wine, champagne, and a million different desserts. Just then God came by and asked, ""Are you hungry? I'm making tuna fish sandwiches if you'd like one."" MT: ""Um, ok, sure."" The next day she does the same thing. Another incredible meal is being laid out. Lobster Newburg, all sorts of game, and even bananas Foster. She had always wondered what …

A butcher in London... So there's a butcher who lives in one of the more run down neighbourhoods of London. As such, he constantly has to deal with petty thieves trying to steal meat out of his shop. He's not an educated man, but he becomes quite crafty in protecting his livelihood. One day, the Duke of Wellington passes by the shoppe on his way to a meeting, and sees the man at work, fighting off thieves. The Duke of Wellington is impressed, and spur of the moment, offers the butcher a generals…

[NSFW] Following on from the condoms joke ... ... the first time I worked in Wales I was in the bar of the pub I was sleeping at and getting on quite well with the locals, something many Englishmen will know can be hard to do if you don't know someone there. One old boy decided, without any prompting, to instruct me on the best ways to make love to a sheep. He said that the two things you could not do without, apart from a good looking sheep, were a dry stone wall and a pair of Wellington boots.…

""Everything goes to my wife: the house, the car, the pension and the life insurance, under the condition that she remarry within the year."" When Jim retired, he and his wife, who was much, much younger, moved to Wellington. Once they'd settled in, he decided it was about time to make a will, so he made an appointment with a lawyer. ""I want it to be nice and straightforward,"" he instructed the attorney: ""Everything goes to my wife: the house, the car, the pension and the life insurance, unde…

What do you call a brown woman with a yeast infection? Beef Wellington