#lou

*aggressively skips to my Lou*

"DOC TELL ME STRAIGHT" doc: u got lou gherrigs disease *cops barge in* ur under arrest "FOR WHAT" cop: mr gherrig reported a missing disease

I can't believe Lou Gehrig's parents named him after a DISEASE

If Bud Abbott and Lou Costello were alive today, their infamous sketch, 'Who's on First?' might have turned out something like this: COSTELLO: CALLS TO BUY A COMPUTER FROM ABBOTT ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you? COSTELLO: Thanks I'm setting up an office in my den and I'm thinking about buying a computer. ABBOTT: Mac? COSTELLO: No, the name's Lou. ABBOTT: Your computer? COSTELLO : I don't own a computer. I want to buy one. ABBOTT: Mac? COSTELLO: I told you, my name's Lou. ABBOT…

If Bud Abbott and Lou Costello were alive today, their infamous sketch, ""Who's on First?"" might have turned out something like this: COSTELLO CALLS TO BUY A COMPUTER FROM ABBOTT ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you? COSTELLO: Thanks. I'm setting up an office in my den and I'm thinking about buying a computer. ABBOTT: Mac? COSTELLO: No, the name's Lou. ABBOTT: Your computer? COSTELLO: I don't own a computer. I want to buy one. ABBOTT: Mac? COSTELLO: I told you, my name's Lou. ABBO…

What device does Mario use to communicate with the dead? A Lou-ouija board.

Jay-Z should open a pizza place. But all good pizza places need a nice Italian name, he could name it.. Lou Menotti's.

A man and his mistress... Lou was an older man, in his 50's. He has been unhappily married to his wife Lorraine for 30 years. While he works 50 hours a week to support the house, all Lorraine does is stay at home and watch TV. Even when Lou gets home from work, Lorraine makes him do dishes, clean the house, and take out the trash. While he's thought of divorce, he wouldn't even dare say that word in front of his wife unless he wanted a slow, and painful death. It seemed there was no way out. The…

I told the bartender I'll have a Lou Gehrig's Disease. It's a tall glass of tequila. You drink half of it, stand up to make a speech, drink the second half of it, and you're dead.

Lou Gehrig... ... died from Lou Gehrig's disease. What are the chances of that?

What do you call... ...a man in a bush? Russel! ...a man in a lake? Bob! ...a man with a car on his head? Jack! ...a man with a spade in his head? Doug! ...a man without a spade in his head? Douglas! ...a man with a toilet on his head? Lou! ...a man with a map on his head? Miles! ...a man hooked to the wall? Art! ...a woman slates on her head? Ruth! ...a man with a plank on his head? Edward! ...a man with TWO planks on his head? Edward Wood! ...a man with THREE planks on his head? Edward Woodwar…

A man is sitting at the bar in his local tavern, furiously imbibing shots of whiskey. One of his friends happens to come into the bar and sees him. ""Lou,"" says the shocked friend, ""what are you doing? I've known you for over fifteen years, and I've never seen you take a drink before. What's going on?"" Without even taking his eyes off his newly filled shot glass, the man replies, ""My wife just ran off with my best friend."" He then throws back another shot of whisky in one gulp. ""But,"" say…

What do you call a man who cleans out toilets ? Lou !

Man goes into a bar... A very thirsty man goes into a bar. As he waits to get the bartender's attention, a regular sitting next to him calls out, "I'll have another waterloo." The bartender gives the regular a tall ice cold drink and asks the newcomer what he would like. The thirsty man points to the man next to him and says, "I guess I'll have what he's having, a waterloo." So the bartender brings the newcomer a tall ice cold drink. The man takes a long deep drink and calls out, "HEY! This isn…