Milk Cow There's an old poor dirt farming family, living on an old poor dirt farm, trying to raise dirt. And the only thing they had that was worth anything at all was this milk cow. It was a really good milk cow, gave a lot of high grade milk. Then they'd take the milk, and make milk and cheese, and sell the excess to get food. And the only thing keeping them going was this milk cow. Now one day, the farmer woke up and he looked outside, and he noticed that his milk cow was dead. He didn't know…

Watch what you eat The old lady put 6 cans of dog food on the supermarket conveyer belt, and began digging in her purse for her coupon. The cashier was the friendly sort, and struck up a conversation. ""So, what kind of dog do you have?"" ""Well,"" the old lady answered in a hushed tone, ""I don't really have a dog. With the price of meat these days, I've figured out that I can make some good, cheap casseroles using dog food. My husband doesn't seem to know the difference, so I'm saving a lot of…

Irish dirt farmers There was a poor dirt farming family in Ireland. All they had was this one milk cow. The would turn the milk to cheese and sell at the market to buy food. Well, one morning, the father wakes up and sees the milk cow dead. So he hangs himself in the tree. The mother wakes up, sees the milk cow dead and her husband hanging from the tree and throws herself into the river and she washes up on the shore. The oldest son wakes up, sees the milk cow dead, his father hanged and, by his…

Notes To The Rural Milkman ""Dear Milkman, I've just had a baby, please leave another one."" ""Please leave an extra pint of paralysed milk."" ""Please don't leave any more milk. All they do is drink it"" ""Milkman please close the gate behind you because the birds keep pecking the tops off the milk."" ""Sorry not to have paid your bill before, but my wife had a baby and I've been carrying it around in my pocket for weeks."" ""Sorry about yesterdays note. I didn't mean one egg and a dozen pints,…