Why did the little boy want Viagra? A little boy with diarrhea tells his Mom he needs Viagra. The Mom asks "Why on Earth do you need that?" The little boy replies, "isn't that what you give Dad when HIS shit won't get hard?!"

A salesman knocks on the door and a small child answers The salses man asks, "Is your father home"? "No, he was ran over by a tractor". "I'm sorry to hear that, is your mother home"? "No, she was ran over by a tractor". "Do you have any big brother or sister at home"? "No, they were ran over by a tractor" "So what are you doing here all alone"? "I'm driving a tractor"

A man calls home from work... His young daughter answers the phone. "Hi sweetie, is your mother close to the phone? The little girl answers, "No, she's upstairs with uncle Paul." A long pause. "You don't have an uncle Paul, honey." He says. She answers, "Yes I do, he's upstairs with mommy, *right now!*" Another long pause. He says, "I want you to go upstairs and bang on mommy's door and say that you just saw daddy's cat pull in the driveway." "Okay..." A loooong pause. She picks…

The only clean joke Michael Caine could think of to tell the Queen. I remember this joke from a TV interview I saw with Michael Caine about 20 years ago, and it's stuck with me: A telemarketer calls a house and a little girl answers the phone: Little girl (LG): \*quiet voice* *"Hello?"* Telemarketer (TM) "Hello there and good day, would you mother be available to talk to?" (LG) \*quiet voice* *"No, she's busy at the moment.*" TM: "Oh, okay, would your father be there at all?" (LG) \*quie…