#englands

England's gonna have a rude awakening when they go to war and all their knights are actors and musicians.

An Englishman and a Scotsman find a shiny lamp. After giving it a rub, a genie pops out... ""For freeing me, you shall each have one wish!"" says the Genie. ""What is it you want the most?"" ""Well,"" says the Englishman, ""I'm fed up with all these Scots coming down into England. I wish for a giant wall to be built around England, so that no Scots can ever get in again."" ""You wish is my command,"" says the genie. ""It is done. ""What is it that you want, Scotsman?"" After a pause, the Scotsma…

Upon England's exit from the Euros... Talks are beginning to emerge for a referendum from FIFA and starting their own international football governing body, in which they will be the only nation invited and will always win no matter what.

What do you call the prince of england's donger? The buckingham phallus.

What's got two wings, a tail and twenty five pricks? England's return flight.

News: Coleen Rooney has flown out to Brazil with her two sons to be with Wayne until England's World Cup campaign is over. That's nice bit far to go for a weekend though if you ask me.

One Friday morning, a teacher came up with a novel way to motivate her class. She told them that she would read a quote and the first student to correctly identify who said it would receive the rest of the day off. She started with, ""This was England's finest hour."" Little Suzy instantly jumped up and said, ""Winston Churchill."" ""Congratulations,"" said the teacher, ""you may go home."" The teacher then said, ""Ask not what your country can do for you."" Before she could finish this quote, a…