A husband and wife are watching a movie The film is about a widower struggling to raise children alone. The wife turns to here husband and says, ""If I die, I want you to remarry, so the kids will have a mother."" He says, ""Yeah, I guess that would be best."" She gets mad at his lack of loyalty. ""Just like that, huh? You'd just replace me."" ""You brought it up. It was your idea. Besides, you're right, it would be better for the kids."" ""Not a moment's hesitation. You'd just bring someone hom…

Farewell Daddy A father put his 3 year old daughter to bed, told her a story & listened to her prayers which ended by saying: ""God bless Mommy, God bless Daddy, God bless Grandma & good-bye Grandpa."" The father asked, ""Why did you say good-bye grandpa?"" The little girl said, ""I don't know daddy, it just seemed like the thing to do."" The next day grandpa died. The father thought it was a strange coincidence. A few months later the father put the girl to bed & listened to her pra…

Golf and vino 70 year old Luigi goes to his doctor for an annual check-up. The doctor is amazed at what good shape Luigi is in and asks, 'How do you stay in such great physical condition?' I'm Italian and a golfer' says Luigi, 'and that's why I'm in such good shape. I'm up well before daylight and out golfing up and down the fairways. I have a glass of vino, and all is well.' 'Well,' says the doctor, 'I'm sure that helps, but there's got to be more to it. How old was your Dad when he died?' 'Who…

The blue gorilla. (Shaggy dog joke) The Blue Gorilla. (Warning, very long) there was once a great photographer, who prided himself on taking a picture of every animal on earth, from the most common bug, to the rarest fish . Well one day, at a big party celebrating the Photographer’s 1,000,000th picture, an old man approached the photographer. “So” he said, “You’ve photographed every animal on earth have you?” “Yep” he said “Every one”. the old man looked at him with doubt. “How about the Purp…